Tell you something ;

2012-02-26T17:04:00.002+08:00

las-tbouquet.tumblr.com

Hit me baby

2011-10-20T17:28:00.002+08:00

I don't even know why am I bothering about your business, answering your calls, talking to you and making myself mad and sad when you don't even concern me anymore. & after that I'd try so hard to go on smiling and pretending everything's fine, and I'm contented with everything about my damn life.

To just keep talking when I don't want to, to just keep going on when you know what I'm going to say about you is true, that was what I thought you did best. But now, to hit and to abuse me when I walk away and turn against you is what you really do the best.

For when you were sick, I'd pour in some effort to make sure you're alright, only to get a simple smile and thank you before you went back to bed for the rest of the day, leaving me alone to do what for the rest of the day I don't even know. I didn't blame you then, I was supposed to accompany you. For when you were alive, kicking and well, I'd listen to you, I'd come look for you, I'd made the effort to do something about this, only to hear excuses of 'I'm tired, I want to sleep', and cancel my plans for the day. For when you are sick and you called me again, I picked up and went over. But what did you do. 不，你没有打断我的身体，你是打破了我的心。Count, not only with just your fingers, the scars you've left on me. And when you are well now, go look for her. Why me ?

You're the one, you're the one that brought me both tears and laughter, then make my life go up and down. I don't know what I should be doing about this now. All I know is that I want for you to stay away, I've been hurt enough, and I've grown sick and tired of this although I know I should have earlier.

I'm doing fine without you.
I'm doing fine without you.
Really fine without you.

Tired

2011-10-19T23:50:00.004+08:00

我今天觉得好累，真的，真的好累。

Exactly how I feel.

2011-09-17T17:03:00.003+08:00

When I don't know what I'm living for, what I'm supposed to make out of this new day.

Slept early on a Friday night and then woke up late. I hate it when my eyes swell. & then my whole face swells up as well. Sigh.

The weather's nice, it isn't raining and it isn't too sunny. But then I'm home not being productive at all. What was this day created for ?

/Hit the books.

Reality Check

2011-09-11T22:38:00.001+08:00

Reality check: It's Monday tmr, the beginning of T4W1, 3 weeks from EOYs.
& I'm still so undisciplined.

Aish, sucks how my brain doesn't seem to register the fact that my studies should be way on top of everything else on my priority list. All I've done during the holidays is just training and holiday homework and tuition. Goodness. Okay means I'll have to study every single day from now till EOYs, this is impt.

SJ just performed their last stage, that should keep me away from the Internet for sometime.

And then they'll comeback with a follow up song a week before the major papers start. Whaaaaaaat is this.Not that I'm complaining though ^^

I need to slap myself. Goodnight folks.
/PS. Hi Kai Qi !

Baaaaangs

2011-09-06T00:23:00.002+08:00

Alright so I went to school with my bangs for the first time after recutting my hair all thanks to Mel but it turned out quite okay so hehehehe.

Right. In fact I'm supposed to be doing Physics TYS but, okay I shouldn't think of excuses. I thought showering would supposedly make me fresher so I can concentrate better but I guess not. 2 more topics for TYS plus half an AM paper and one TB exercise due by 12.30pm tmr and it's already 12.12am now. I rly miss my nerd period, hmm. I need it back. Meanwhile, I have a long way to go to the completion of my holiday homework and going at this rate I don't think I'll be able to have any time to study for EOYs.

Okay training has been quite alright. Today has been tiring though. Don't need run stairs today kekekeke ~ I should lose weight soon, I'm become so breathless after spiking 3-4 balls in a rally.

Aish I'm rly upset.

September

2011-09-01T21:19:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since I blogged, but these days have been pretty great.

Teacher's day celebration today, marks the start of September holidays as well. So I've already started on homework, and just hoping that I'll continue being productive till the end of holidays. The fact that EOYs starts on T4W5, no. Actually T4W2. Hasn't sunk in. Don't know why. I have yet to study, so I should rly do something about it, especially Physics. The fact that I've been failing Physics this whole year doesn't give me confidence either.

Alright so had celebrations in school today, nothing new. Then went back to St. Hilda's with the AHS people. No one changed, hahaha. Didn't exactly catch up, more like just talking, saw some teachers and that's it. Left with Joanne early since there wasn't rly a point staying. Didn't see all of 6/8, which is quite saddening, but nevermind. I've never really been good with maintaining friendships.

These few months have been just hanging around with teammies and it's great since they're a fun bunch. Then again haven't been talking to old classmates and 2 years of closeness is gone so quickly, feels like we're strangers already. What to do. Maybe it's just because of me.

Holiday training. Merger has been okay, just don't get how my performance can be so unstable and it irks me. Gotta work harder !! January is nearing.

Lord

2011-08-08T23:15:00.002+08:00

Dear God, today I reflected upon my sins. I feel horrible, I'm full of remorse. Lord, thank you for your selflessness, your sacrificial love upon someone so shameless like me. Thank you for dying on the cross to wash away my sins, to forgive me of all the wrongs I've committed. Dear Lord, please give me the wisdom and the strength starting from today, to help me start anew, to be a better person and change for the better. Help me to learn how to cherish the chances I'm given, the opportunity to live a new day. Please help me to be someone better for my family, friends and relatives. Please give me a new heart, mind and soul from this day, to have a brand new start, to change my perspective of life. I want to be worthy child of yours dear lord, and I really pray for your guidance upon me as I step onto a new path of my life from now. I commit all these into your hands, and in your name I pray, amen.

I'm the biggest bitch around.

Comeback

2011-07-17T15:52:00.002+08:00

Watching the male version of Miss Hong Kong so...it's Mr Hong Kong ? HAH. Anyway, point is, SJM'S Supergirl is used as the contestants intro song, kyaaaaa !

Okay met with teammies at McDonald's for breakfast first. Overslept an hour and ended up cabbing there :x After that went to school to help out with DSA trials and other than that it was all free and easy and we just played and played. Hehe quite fun, then had to help sort out the medals for sports day prize giving. This year medals so nice ! Skipped church 'cos of that since I couldn't make it, then went out for lunch with teammies at Nex.

Simple Saturday just spent with teammies but I enjoyed it. Hee.

/PS. SUJU IS COMING BACK

Handsome fishes

2011-07-13T18:42:00.002+08:00

Nothing much to elaborate on this amount of perfection. Compared to Eunhyuk's poor bleached hair.

I was saved today

2011-07-09T22:43:00.002+08:00

Just when I was stray, I was picked up again and sent to the house of God to be saved and redeemed.

Today was a meaningful and well spent Saturday. Never have I spent my Saturday so fruitfully. Zhen Rong invited me to her church today, together with Jasmine and Mel invited by Ting Ting and Sim Hong. I didn't know there was a church near Paya Lebar MRT, but that was the best service I've attended to date. The place didn't look so formal and traditional or stuff like that, like the one I last attended years ago. It looked like a concert, and yes the picture up there is wear I sung aloud and cried out to my Lord Jesus.

Felt a bit awkward at first, but after a while it was okay. Since it was youth service, everyone was really friendly and extremely nice and fun to hang out with. Met some new people, and had a really meaningful lesson on commitment and compromising. I missed singing all those worship songs and talking with God. I thought it was really great, and now I want to find my way back to him. It's been a while, a while since I've done my quiet time. Now I feel so stupid for getting addicted to songs which hold no meaning.

Hung around after service with the very extremely, super friendly and nice youths there together with some Cedarians before heading home. Today was good.

More of Jesus in my life,

More of Jesus so I shine,

Your peace on Earth,

Your peace on Earth.

Tenth

2011-07-04T00:57:00.002+08:00

Mm, haven't really blogged for a long time. But life has been meaningful and fruitful thus far, seems much brighter and happier than before. I like it.

Many many things has been happening actually. I just blog to try to keep track of the more memorable events in my life, so someday I'll just look back and hopefully smile. Volleyball has been great as usual, training basics like spiking and everything which I really find useful. Started doing something like gym already and having muscle aches, so that's a good sign. Nothing much really happened except for one that I remember which is Coach Janson's surprise visit to our school on our last day of holiday training to come train us. The only thing memorable was that everyone was so dead, but suddenly became so noisy because of his appearance. He's a really nice coach, it's nice working with him (:

Other than that, results weren't so good. So I'm already wanting to study hard for the next test. Mom doesn't seem to take my results to consideration too much, 'cos she's already taking me out shopping 'cos its GSS now. Been shopping for 2 days and reaching hope past 11pm+. Pretty tiring actually, but it's been a really long time, there's finally new addition to my now-small wardrobe.

Spent the day out today. For the first time my phone has been put into such good use since we used it to find our way to Singapore Flyer, haha.

Had dinner which is expensive and not so good though the place looked good, before having Gelato. Then just walked around and took pictures. Nothing too fun, but it's been a while since I've actually gone out during the evening especially during sunset and taking a stroll. Today has been great.

Tomorrow shall be left for tuition homework, and I'm ready for a new week at school.

It just keeps getting better !

2011-06-21T00:12:00.002+08:00

Volleyball has been awesome and fun and just great recently, it's been going on pretty well !! My performance has been, not so stable but at least I think it's decent. Anyway,

Today had training as per normal. Jiaolian is like no longer coaching us anymore, he keeps training the juniors since well...their season's coming up but, I miss his trainings. So now we're under Mr Tan for training and we're going back to basics again. Receiving has never been so difficult and we're doing ball handling all over again. Trainings has been boring since it's like just go there and do warm up --> basics ---> physical. We don't even get to play match with juniors anymore, don't know why ): Since we were to head down to St Hilda's today to be the demo team for some workshop for coaches held by a really nice and friendly yet cool USA olympic coach, we left early hehe :B

Changed out into jersey after training in school and headed to Tampines. Decided to head to the primary school ! Ahhh, I MISS MY SCHOOL ! Feels good to be back. Nothing's changed, just different paint. Ate and changed shoes and stuff before heading to St Hilda's Sec to meet Dr Lim who brought us to the sports hall. THE SPORTS HALL IS. AWESOME ! So damn big I can't even asdfghjkl. There's even a lift. Most amusing part ? It looks exactly the same as those in the HDB flats. You know, the two rectangular windows on the doors xD

The sports hall building itself is so huge you can like actually get lost in there, srsly. We still walked quite a fair bit from the lift to the volleyball courts and there were like...FOUR. Their courts are so new, the floor wood so nice to play on. Aish I hate our school's sports hall :\ We were taught some drill called 'Wash' and it wasn't really very fun like what they told us but still, ohwell. Just played around abit here and there and the last thing we did was to play QUEEN ON TOP ! Ah, Aussie trip memories. DAMN FUN. Started out with 3 on 3, then adjusted the rules, then changed to 2 on 2 full court. Paired with Jasmine (Y) I was just glad I spiked over and did a rly nice save :B Hehehe.

6 / 7 hours of volleyball finally ended and then headed to buy bbt from where I always used to go to after school when I was studying there before heading to the interchange and home. Today was all volleyball volleyball volleyball with only about 6 hours of sleep. Tiring but fun ^^ Took a short nap before doing my Math holiday homework which I completed (yay), packed my table and here I am blogging.

Today was great, well spent and fruitful and productive.

The best damn thing

2011-06-17T21:33:00.002+08:00

Today was an extremely fruitful day and, excluding the Aussie trip, one of the most memorable days I spent with teammies ♥

Sure, we have had many team lunches together after all the trainings for the past 2 and a half years together, sweat together, cry together, but today was really special. Although training today was completely boring, since both coaches were seemingly in a foul mood and thus we only worked on basics and did not do any skill training, I find that I've spent more time understanding my teammates today. Warmed up with Charissa, then served and spiked and did foot drills before doing setting and receiving. Today was pretty much self training, but physical went on well, I'm glad I hung on (:

Went out for lunch at KFC after washing up and had to run back halfway into Potong Pasir 'cos we were running late for the mental skills workshop thinghy. The workshop got me to think a lot more about the team rather than myself, and it seems like the rest of them feels the same way too. Rather than writing down our thoughts, we talked a lot more about our team. How there are things that needs to be corrected, what makes a great team, and things like that. And though I know that we may not be the best team out there in terms of skills, but we are a really great team. Whenever we lose focus, there's always someone else to get us back into the game, there's always someone to pick us up after we fall, there's always someone to give us encouragements. Through the talk we had we definitely spilled out all our thoughts, everyone said what was on their mind, and I really like how we're so bonded and close together. Be it on or off court, I love that togetherness we have.

We may feel like giving up, or not giving a damn about training at times, but then again it's because of one another that we're still in the team, and not choosing to quit. It's this unspoken feeling that we have for one another which is impossible to describe in words.

We asked ourselves, what do we want ?

What is stopping us ?

And when we talked about what was on our mind, we figured that it was the process that matters, and not always the results. Process goals are important, like how we should learn to open up in order to merge with the sec 2s next year. We're bonded now and it's easy for us to play as a team, but when we merge, then what lies ahead of us ? We are eventually going to be one team, and we have to get that right, before we work towards our goal of entering the National Top 4s. Sounds ridiculous, as if we're aiming too high, but I think that if we were to start working on that starting today, impossible is nothing.

More than working on my personal mental skills, I personally felt that we were able to understand one another more than we already do, and actually further strengthen the bonds we have between all of us. We don't have cliques anymore, rather, we're comfortable with one another, which is what I definitely enjoy very much. Had the urge to train again right after the workshop, and hopefully this mindset stays and continues for the rest of volleyball journey. Volleyball has been one of my life's greatest lesson, and I'm thankful for having the chance to be able to be part of this wonderful team. Failures are inevitable, but I've definitely learnt much more from my experiences.

Dear Rocker Goats, you're one of the best things that has happened in my life, and I hope we'll cherish this unique friendship for a long long time. People say the friendship between teammates are not only stronger than other friendships, but they also last longer. I'm looking forward to that, and I believe we'll all really start working hard to achieve greater heights.

I LOVE YOU TEAM
Oh, and one more thing, LENGYEN, I MISS YOU, WE MISS YOU, COME BACK SOON !! ♥

New

2011-06-14T00:19:00.002+08:00

This is my first entry in my new place ! (:

It's pretty small. Okay not pretty small, how about very small. Well, can't complain if you wanna live in a new yet reasonable priced condo unit. Hehe, so nevermind about that. On the other hand, it's really cosy. My room only has a 2 door wardrobe, bed and a desk. I'm using my bay window as my book shelf since there's no way it can fit in ._. For now, weird things are flying into my room since the window's big, so I've been sleeping with the air condition. The home is really holy, I wake up to see a church every morning :B

Haha anyways, so far it's not too bad. Today was supah fun ! (Y) Training supposed to end at like 10.30am 'cos juniors have match for both team A and B. So...yeah, we can't self train either so we all just end at the same time. Headed to HG Sports Hall with Guting and Mel to watch juniors match, then headed for lunch at HG mall at the food court with them. We are starting to bond with the sec 2 juniors, they're rly cute !! Exchanged information about different members, and I'm definitely the master of imitations. HEH. Okay ate and talked for v long, before we left and I headed home.

Mom was playing Bejeweled in the study, so I went and talked to her about my Insomnia recently, how I can't sleep early. This sucks, I hate it and I keep counting sheeps. So she asked me to swim laps in the pool, so I can sleep better tonight. Not sure how she got that idea or how it really links but, yeah I went swimming in the end anyway. Sometimes I really wonder if all the old people stays here since NO ONE uses the gym or the pool. I bet I was the first to swim, hehehe. Swam around 20 laps before coming up.

I should really start exercising soon. I am gaining weight and NAPFA is after the holidays. I've been eating the same but sleeping a lot. So, I've started my work out plan just yesterday, when I was supposed to start the first weekend of the holidays ._. Went skating on Sunday but got a blister since the socks weren't long enough, had training + swimming today, and tmr will be gym. A bit excited, looking forward. I'm getting bored of the internet so I'm finally gna start on homework too ! ^^

Okay there's a lot of irrelevant information. Or too much maybe. But today has been great and super super...great. Ahwell, just get it.

Last night,

2011-06-03T17:15:00.002+08:00

I will rly miss you, the home where I spent 10 years of my life in !! Which is probably about 1/8 of my life, assuming I live at least till the age of 80.

Lala spent most of this week doing packing, even missing lunching together with teammies aft training on Wednesday and Friday in order to pack. So, I'm more or less done. People came to box my stuff and wrap the furnitures, leaving only my bed and a pillow. How sad. It's only now then I realised how disgustingly dirty my room is. There are cobwebs and layers of dust at the corners of my room. There's a spider who crawled on my pillow just 5 minutes after I placed it there. How am I gna sleep, it really feels like I'm gna be sleeping in some jail, meh. Packed about 6 boxes of clothes and gave away at least 6 bags of clothes as well. Ya know, if I sold all the pieces of clothes that I gave away for 10 bucks each, I think I could've earned like...half a year's worth of allowance, at least. Poor Mom tried selling but it wasn't too successful since her clothes are too small for everyone. Kekekekeke.

Anygays, training was rly laugh-worthy today and I can't not blog about it. We have a new hand signal and mascot. Hahaha ! Did some weights today which was...kinda different and something we haven't exactly done before and man, all of our hands were so suan. So match with juniors later was really pretty disastrous but heck, we had fun. Jiaolian left early and we just rly, laughed and laughed and played and played. It's been a while since I laughed till I get a stomachache. Hehe :B

Everything's packed into boxes now and I had to find and dig out my lappie from the 123456789 boxes I have in the house. So, there's basically nothing else to do except surf the net till tonight :\ Got to wake up early to move tmr so, guess this is it ! Tonight will be the last night spent here in this house. I will rly miss you !! All the memories you created in the past when we had a rly big family, when my friends came, ah srsly. May your next owner treat you well !!

Love,

Jan.

Impatient

2011-05-30T22:36:00.002+08:00

I am so frustrated. Ugh.

Today's training went on pretty well, though physical started. After warm up, just did physical which involved some conditioning since its pre season and man, my body is in bad shape. Then trained spiking again, and then free spike, and then played with juniors. Didn't get to play subset today but its okay hehe, played outside spiker ^^ I feel like my spiking has improved ever since I came back from exam break so I'm pretty happy. Hope it stays this way :B Lunched together and then went home and got reprimanded for going out early in the morning but coming home late instead of packing my room.

Geez. I hate packing my room. And now that we're actually renting a place, it means we're gonna have to move AGAIN when we buy a home. Only cleared like 4 compartments of my bookshelves and I'm becoming so impatient and frustrated. There's a think layer of dust on my storybooks and old textbooks and I don't know which ones I would need in future. Plus, there are unused notebooks but then again I don't think I'll use them in the future so I don't know what to do with them. Sigh, problems then come along with packing.

Packed 2 boxes full of books and sorted out stuff to give away and stuff to dispose. Not even done with my books and I still have my clothes to pack. This sucks.

Super Great Day

2011-05-27T22:42:00.002+08:00

It's the last day of Term 2 !! So fast.

Today was awesome !! I mean, though half day didn't really turned out to be half day. But it was fun nevertheless, and definitely well spent ! (: Went to school and changed to PE straight after morning assembly and went to play captain's ball with the class for like 2 periods. Played murderer and some bang game and it was so funny and all hahaha ! But playing with Mr Eng is like so, um, how should I put this. Intimidating. Right. Or maybe that's an understatement. Ohwell !! Only went back up to class by 9.15am and we got changed AND arranged the tables and chairs and got the floor swept all in 5 mins, got our drinks which Mr Eng treated us, and headed for principal's address. I mean, awesome or what. We cooooolz.

And congrats to Rena and Amirah !! Class domination woohoo. After school got changed and went for training. Jiaolian was pretty scary at first, but his mood became better and we all had fun. I mean, we didn't really train. It's more like..playing. 'Cos everything was fun hehehehe ^^ Only started to get tired during the last set but other than that, it was really fun. Hehehe :B

Then went for lunch tgt at Macs and just stayed there and talked for a few hours before we decided to leave 'cos this random middle aged guy started walking to the long table of Cedarians behind us and talked to them about learning how to use English properly (?) Eesh I don't know. So we decided to leave quickly hahaha. I wonder whatever happened to be 1 hour curfew. So far we have plans to go to WWW this Tuesday !! Yipeeeeeeeee :D Vanessa is so excited it really amuses me haha !

Updated AFF too ! Like finally.

But after updating one chapter I feel kinda lazy to continue though I have everything inside my head, whoops.

OPEN HOUSE TMR

Take a breather

2011-05-26T16:37:00.002+08:00

MYE IS OVER, LIBERATIONNNNN.

Lalalala it's been such a long time since I've been on the com. (gropes gropes gropes) Then comes all the software updates ._. Kam quat. Nevertheless, I'm so glad it's over. It went pass fast and slow, hehe ! Just glad that what I studied for Lit came out for both Chrysalids and Boom so I happily did my Lit paper with half an hour left ^^ But then again, whether I wrote my points well to earn marks is a different story. It's so difficult to score in lit peesh. I felt like I had writer's block for Boom 'cos my paragraphs were so short and...short. Comparing to Chrysalids.

Anygay, went to have lunch with Lengy and Jas again at Eighteen Chefs before making my way home. Time to catch up on SJM goodness in Taiwan !! All those variety shows I no longer have to watch with my small phone screen yahooooo (Y) Time to update AFF too !! Like finally.

Okay half day tmr = clean the 200m track + training. Bummer.

MYEs

2011-05-19T22:07:00.002+08:00

MYEs starts tmr !! English and Chem papers tmr and for both I'm equally nervous. It's been quite a while since I wrote situational, and an essay that I'm satisfied with ):

Dear Lord Jesus, MYEs are starting tmr and I pray that you'll help me to do well for it. Please guide me through my papers and help me to finish them on time without much difficulty. I really really want to do well so I pray for your utmost guidance. Help me to be able to write smoothly and keep a calm and focused mind when answering my questions. Help me to put in my best and finish it with no regrets. Meanwhile I also pray that you discipline me to help me study hard for my other papers next week. I commit my examinations into your hands and that everything will go on smoothly. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen.

Rly hope to ace Chem ): I've invested so much time on it !
Good luck to all !!

Darn

2011-05-15T22:13:00.002+08:00

I can wait forever for this Friday to come. I'm totally unprepared for MYEs, which starts on Friday.

AISH dear Jan, why can't you understand the importance or feel the urgency of MYEs T^T Srsly. I'm spending too much time on my phone now that I'm on hiatus for my lappie. This sucks. I should turn off my wifi starting tmr during the day to control myself. Ohwait, but then again, I've data plan. AHHH. This weekend, I've completed 2 exam papers, studied 3 chapters of Science topics. Not so productive. I kinda regret wasting the whole of tday though. I was supposed to finish a he'll load of stuff.

Oh but then again, I'm always procrastinating knowing that I'll regret it. I'm so silly. Thankfully Tuesday's a holiday, so I'm gna spend the whole of it preparing for Chem on Friday. I have to do well. I rly rly rly have to and that means I have to study hard. Okay I'm gna study hard starting tmr, even if it means gorging on food while I'm at it. Cos I'm gna lose all that weight in the gym and through moving house. SJ/Donghae hiatus starts tmr as welllll !!!

Jan be serious.

Congratulations

2011-04-28T22:50:00.002+08:00

Today is the 2000th day since Super Junior's debut ! And their upcoming Japanese single is ranked first for subscription sales at TOWER RECORDS in Japan ! Congratulations, chukahae ! :D SM TOWN LIVE in Paris was also sold out in 15 minutes. Daebak ! ^^

And today has been a good day. Staying awake throughout the school day, not feeling tired, paying attention (: Lessons were all good too :B OH OH and ting xie went well and I passed my pop quiz YEEHOO. Night bbs !

Awesum Possum

2011-04-27T22:25:00.002+08:00

Days like today are hard to come by. Today has been great ! Though not entirely.

Firstly Math was okay cos...Leong's didn't come :x Hehe I prefer Mr Lin's lessons to his. And Mr Lin's last day is on x-country day ): Speakng of x-country, there was like a preparation run for PE ytd ._. Though tiring I felt super accomplished for completing the 3.6pm when it isn't exactly compulsory ^^ But I guess I'm just gna stroll on the day itself :B Hahaha. I'm never so disciplined unless on a treadmill so, cool ! HK buddies came and I was like candidly asked to buddy. So awkward but damn funny keke. Didn't interact much, but I don't feel anything ohwell, HEE.

TOP was awesome. Super awesome. Lit students had their lit course. All of us weren't rly looking forward to it cos we wanted to watch T&F, but it turned out great ! Some left for T&F afterwards but there was training :\ Anyway, he was Mr Jacob Sam-la Rose. Firstly, a rly cool name I likeyyyyy !! He's great. Okay that's under statement. But damn, his poems are rly awesome and I'm a happy kid cos I got an autographed copy of his work ^^ Literature is beautiful. Wrote poems today and like what he said, people always see the product, but not the process. It's the process that's meaningful, and being able to personally go through it makes it even better. I wna go back for another session ):

Reluctantly left and headed for trng whereby they were towards the end of warm up. Our team minimized to 5 people cos the rest probably went to watch T&F finals which kinda made Jiaolian unhappy so as much as I want to watch soccer on Friday.. Guess I can't. Sigh. But anyway tday's trng was fun. Got to spike a lot. Played spiker for matches too and I like it cos it's cdiv net :B Hehe. Subset's fun but spiking is better when the net is low and I kinda got the hang of it. Got picked up, dinner, shower, homework, sleep.

If everyday was like tday,

EYD

2011-04-23T22:48:00.002+08:00

EYD was fun, though I forgot to bring my camera and was lazy to use my phone to take pictures. So I just used other people's cameras teeheeeee :B

I'm pretty grateful for having school uniforms to wear 'cos damn, it's so hot to dress like that to school. The long weekend started yesterday and I've finished Leong's homework. Left with Lin's work, 2 qns of partial fractions, Chinese and I'm done. Tmr is Sunday already, so fast.

Yes, I've been wasting my weekends.

Life

2011-04-18T22:09:00.003+08:00

Okay so I haven't been updating much. I don't see the need to blog recently cos nothing interesting has been happening recently. It's supposedly bedtime now so I'm blogging from my mobile.

Sleeping late makes me more awake the next day I figured. Slept around 12am ytd but I manages to stay awake throughout school and pay attention for all the lessons ^^ Except for English where I kinda started day dreaming cos..there was nothing interesting and necessary to know anyway :x Was in a good mood throughout, even for training ! Forgot to bring fbt tday heheh.

Speaking of training. I sweated alot today. To the extent that I dripped sweat on the floor. Yeah gross. It was the physical that was sweat inducing. Jumped rope, 3 sets of 1 minute and it wasn't too bad considering it's been a long time and the rope was too short for me so I kept tripping. How does jumping rope affects our body ? Just saying. Did IPU too and man I damn suck. I'll stop at the 'C' mark. Sit ups was fine, I'm pretty confident of my ab muscles :B Other than that, only spiked, played 4 v 4, free spike and played 1 set with juniors. Wasn't too tiring so it's okay. Pretty manageable (:

OH and I started writing fics on Friday ! Sounds lame but heck, it's damn addictive and as long as I like it I'll just do it. Wrote 12 chapters during the weekend. There are silent readers, and nice readers who comment ^^ Me likey. But I guess I can't update until the weekend again. It's quite time consuming :\ Got an offer to co-write but I'm only gna do it after MYEs else there'd be too much to handle ): Seems interesting since I'm all new to it hehe.

Today was pretty fun. No Monday blues. School was fun.
Can you believe it.

It's okay, it's alright

2011-04-12T19:29:00.002+08:00

This week has passed by pretty quickly so far and sad to say it is quite unproductive.

I'm so upset about the fact that I can't focus on my studies recently. All I care about is catching on entertainment news online when I could probably be making use of the time studying or making some sense out of Logarithms for that matter. Sigh. On top of that I've been rather sleeping during class. Okay not during class, during Chem. To be specific. With the exception of tday when I got distracted for Physics. Argh what is wrong with me. COME ON GOH, YOU MAD ?!

That aside, went to watch a netball match for the first time in my entire life and heck it's so confusing. Just heard the whistles blowing and each time I wish there would magically be subtitles to tell me what is going on so I kept on asking and I figured it's quite irritating so I just watched on and didn't give a damn about whistles, meh. Ohwell, overall I think the game wasn't too bad. Netball is interesting !! Haha. Exactly the same case as ours. It's okay guys !! Never look down !

Bused back and KNC is like so near my hse. I can take at least 4 buses home from there. Awesome or what. Speaking of home, I have to move by July 4th. Which is quite soon considering all that I have to pack. Geez, I love my neighbourhood and my house. Everything about it. So many direct buses everywhere. EVERYWHEREEEEE. Hmph. Okay okay abrupt but I should start doing Chinese now else I'd go on and on. (Rly, EVERYWHERE !!)

I wonder if TOP's gna be really wet tmr. I hope not, really do.

Happy Birthday Siwon !

2011-04-07T21:17:00.002+08:00

Tday 'happybdaychoisiwon' is trending on twitter ! Hehe they're taking turns. In a rush so Imma do a quick one !!

May you continue to shine brightly and be happy ! All the best for your activities and drama filming in Taiwan and may they be completed smoothly ! Taking care of your body is most important so stay healthy and continue to spread God's word like you always do ! :B

Okay gotta go, just hope training goes well tmr !!

Happy Birthday Hyukkie !

2011-04-04T22:07:00.002+08:00

'asiaanchovyday' is trending on Twitter haha !! Happy birthday Lee Hyuk Jae !! Stay healthy and may you continue to shine brightly like you always do ! God Bless !

Hehe imma edit this post with a piccu once I get hold of my lappie ! Other than that, my weekend is blog worthy haha. The fact that I could slack off my Friday and almost half my Saturday after tuition, and manage to complete all my homework before going out on Sunday makes me happy :B Had lunch with Dad before going to visit granddaddy at the hospital. He looks so sick and pale and old suddenly. Looking at the elderlies beside him I feel kinda scared and a little sad for them. Esp the one just next to granddaddy is this fragile looking elderly who's just skin and bones. It freaks me out. As much as I want to talk to granddaddy, I couldn't do much except listen cos I can understand but can't speak :\ Even if I speak he can't rly hear well. I wonder if he's discharged already tday :\

Left for Vivo with Dad after that and by the time we reached the rain stopped (: Had ice cream and walked around for few hours waiting for time to pass before meeting up with half the team to leave for Sentosa while the other half went for movie. Reached there at 4pm+ and though it was late, it was damn hot. Played by the side cos of the lack of courts and slacked around a little, it was fun ! It's been awile since I've hit the beach. Late evening around 6pm we finally got a court to play with some other people. Haha so funny ! Movie peeps called when they ended but figured that it's better to have dinner separately so we just showered and went back to Vivo for dinner. Met Ms Poon at the mrt otw home with Felina. Coincidental, much.

In the end I woke up 1 hour late and had to cab to school T^T Trng was pretty fun ! Physical started again but I'm proud of myself for working hard during PT ! ^^ Blocked quite alot and sweat alot for trng tday, it's been awile since it's like that. Overall it was pretty fun ! Talked to juniors aft that then homed to study Chem :\ Meh. I'd better go to bed and hopefully I won't oversleep.

Happy 7th

2011-04-02T21:50:00.002+08:00

Just done with the ecareers thinghy and haha FINALLY a change of results for this year !! I'm just glad I've got interior designers and idea architects in it ! Recently I've been considering different things I'd like to try out when I grow older, like script writing. It seems pretty interesting.

Alright anyway I did it again - I'm done with my weekend homework ! Hehe. For the rest of the night I can enjoy eating papaya and study Chem and start doing the TB qns for Logarithms. I have yet to pack for tmr, I'm lazy. Gotta pack shower items which is the worst thing to pack, grr. Mom asked why didn't I tell her earlier so she could book a hotel for us to shower in. Hah ! Mom is becoming so open recently, I like (Y)

Time flies fast, this month will go on smoothly ! Seventh Heaven.

We we we so excited

2011-04-02T16:06:00.002+08:00

April Fool's was yesterday and it was so fun !! Hehehehe.

First prank of the day failed for us when we swapped class with 4S. Mr Tay didn't even came into their classroom and just stood outside ._. Bleh. Then we came back down on peeped through the window and saw that 4S greeted Mdm Tan and it worked for them. Sigh, how sad. Other than that the day went pass as per normal. Understood a littleeee bit of Chem at least and didn't get back pop quiz on logarithms which made me feel a tad bit more relaxed knowing that I won't have to face the wrath of Eng + Lin. I know I did badly.

Training later and yay seniors came to join us and we played match with them and Woo I played setter !! Yay so fun so fun !! But my balls were all kinda close to the net so that's kinda bad. Sec 3s decided to prank the rest and yeah it worked heheheh !! Purposely got Guting to spike from the back court, and then acts like she sprained her ankle. Everyone was fooled. Yay fun fun. Jiaolian left early so overall it was quite slack and chaotic but pretty fun anyway !

Haven't touched homework so I'd better get them done by tday and enjoy my beachy day tmr. PLEASE DON'T RAIN !!

But I promised myself to smile

2011-03-29T16:54:00.003+08:00

Had a weird day of school. A rather awkward atmosphere between teammates because of a topic we know we should avoid but we just can't. It's hard to hold it in, it's hard to pretend like it didn't happened in the first place.

I'm too bothered and busy trying to preoccupy my mind with something else than to get irritated at people today. Which is good, and bad. Went to school in the morning grabbing my shoebag instead of my file before going back into the house again and switching. I feel so weird. Went to school, and the time has come for us to chase on the stuff we've missed which actually piles up to alot. Had combined lessons for Chemistry today and Jasmine and I just totally stared blank leaving the room without getting a single shit. Saw Guting on the way out tday while going home so we talked about.

On the outside, nothing has happened. Deep inside, we all know our hearts are crushed. Guting raised the topic on the redsports article that just came up.

"Cedar Girls’ have seen their dream run come to an end as they were sent packing after this match’s loss."

Told myself I'd forget about it when I wake up for a brand new day but it's just stuck inside. Everywhere I turn in school, we just see familiar faces around and share hugs and 'Cheer up, don't think about it anymore. It's the past.' It hurts, but this is reality. It's sad to see all of us putting up a strong front to comfort one another when we already know they themselves have yet to get over it.

We were just at the doorstep of being at the top 4, of making history for our team. Those 2 painful points. Seriously..why ? What have we not done enough. Have we not trained enough ? Have we not gone through enough conflicts ? Have we not gone through enough sweat to know how hard our road is ? Have we not put in enough effort ? Just what went wrong. Sometimes I'm glad that the loss we suffers helps us to bounce back stronger for our next match but. This is our last.

Seeing the people from performing arts groan because of extra practices their seniors arranged, I envy them. I remember how I used to dread training initially, but slowly grew fonder. Why the hell did I even dread training in the first place ? Cos I didn't know I'd regret. I wished we had extra practices for our next match too. People envy us cos we're free to go home while they practice and we just smile and laugh it off saying ''Cos we're out already what. Hahaha." I don't even feel happy going home. I miss how we left class early and meet up in the canteen to change and start taking pictures. Assembling in the foyer and changing into our smelly shoes. Getting on the bus and playing hand games from our childhood and ending the day together with team lunch after a match. This I miss the most. I wish this was a nightmare, and when we attend our next training, it'll be training for a purpose, our one common dream.

'Why are you overreacting? Let bygones be bygones.'

Man, I'd like to know too.

United as one, we're not torn apart.

2011-03-28T19:51:00.002+08:00

It was a pity. But point by point we chased, never letting go, giving it our best, summoning our energy, cheering with our hearts accompanied by sighs of reliefs and tears of both joy and sadness.

The journey for CGVB B'div '11 has unfortunately come to an end. But that doesn't mean we're torn apart. Never. I'm just gna make a promise that I will try my best for every single training until the next season starts again. History will never repeat itself. At least I don't want to.

The match was close. I would readily have accepted defeat if the score gap was wide but, the loss was just 3 points. We've trained so hard. I mean, of course. Which team wouldn't say that right ? But I felt that we were so well prepared. We just weren't playing to our maximum potential, that's all. At the end of the day, it's whether we tried our best that matters, and we did. Heck, so what if I'm a ball picker. I'm proud to have don that jersey and be part of that wonderful team. We've travelled so far and it's okay, the team deserves to be applauded.

Cedar volleyball you did great. No. You did awesome.

But we just lost beautifully. ♥

Accomplished

2011-03-26T21:38:00.003+08:00

This weekend has been productive and I like it ! (Y)

Hehe, anyways, went for tuition today and it started one hour earlier because Mdm Tan had classes on in the afternoon :\ So Sophia came earlier too and since both of us were there together I waited for her to end so we could go home together and I thought I could sit there and slack but..it was 3 hours of Chinese while she only had 1 hour T^T But it's okay, I finished my Chinese weekend homework nicely ! (:

Finished most of my work on Friday night 'cos I restricted myself to only 1 variety show. Tried to finish doing Physics but DAMN, Physics is so difficult I REALLY REALLY do not know how to do despite trying so my paper only has workings but no solutions ): Probably need to ask Jasmine or Toh about it on Monday, sigh. Other than that only left with Geog presentation and Lit presentation + write up. Did quite a lot for Lit already and emailed it to the rest to let them continue. I feel good and proud of my work ! :B

As for Geography, supposed to meet up at ehub tmr at 4pm but I don't know if I should go or do my part and send to them to let them continue tmr. Either that or talk to them on skype and discuss tmr or something. 'Cos I missed Daddy day last week, plus Grandma is sick and I feel bad if I don't spend time with her tmr. Hmm. I shall just do my best first and do as much for the presentation for tonight.

I'm in a good mood today. If I finish stuffs by tonight, tmr I can study and catch up on Math and Chem ! YAY.

You do it best when you like it,

2011-03-23T21:16:00.002+08:00

I have once again found the joy of playing volleyball, and I'm lovin it.

Initially started off school with lessons and all smoothly and well 'cos first of all I didn't feel sleepy in any class and was alright throughout the day. Had English Timed Assignment. I don't think I'll do very well, but I assume I wouldn't do to badly either. I'm just hoping for a B at least. Tralala, recess and all and after awile got reminded of training and felt pretty sianded by the fact. But ohwell,

After school juniors got dismissed early so the nets were set for us already when we reached. Jasmine, Mel and I were the first and the rest weren't arriving yet so we just played ball. HIGH ball. No actually, very high ball. Haha it was funnnn !! Few of them came after awile and we were allowed to do homework while waiting for the rest to come so we did. Analysed my Alice in Wonderland poem with the team and goodness they are so weird. Alice in Wonderland was mistaken for Jack and the beansprout by Claire, and UP by Cheryl. Aishhh.

Anyway trng started in awile and trained the main team on the more important stuff before having free spike and dismissing everybody. I AM TRYING TO GET MY SPIKING DONE WELL. My timing has been off recently even for warm up but for the past 2 trainings I've gotten it back so I'm rly glad. As for the jumping timing I'm really..I'm just gna continue working on it. Anyway, sec 3s stayed behind to play with juniors and it was so funnnnn !! And that's when I just wanted to play and never leave. Wasn't even tired. Got thrashed the first set, thrashed them back the second set haha. I PLAYED DOUBLE SETTER TOO. So fun so fun so fun. I rly like it.

Pepper Lunched before going home to already completed homework :B

When you like what you're doing,

you wna keep on going despite the troubles you're facing.

I understood that today.

In a few more hours,

2011-03-20T20:11:00.002+08:00

SCHOOL IS GNA START AGAIN T^T. OH HELL.

I have 4 blanks for inference qns for the English WS, and a half done comprehension. I have 4 short qns left for Physics, and a few blanks for Math WS. Other than that, Chemistry notes is not due till Wednesday, and I have no idea how to do Logarithms whereby there's 4 examples awaiting me to complete.

AND WHAT ABOUT THAT DAMN SCARY LIT PRESENTATION ?

Relevance

2011-03-20T00:07:00.000+08:00

This is ttly relevant.

'Eyes-wna-close' kind of tired

2011-03-19T22:50:00.003+08:00

It's been a long time since I felt this kind of tired-ness this early. It's usually mentally or physically kind of tired but aish it doesn't feel so good either anyway.

Anywho. It's gna be Sunday in an hour's time. And term 2 in 25 hours time. THIS. SUCKS. I don't wna go out tmr I just wna stay home and sleep in pretty please ): Hmm. I feel like calling Dad now. --- Okay I just dropped him an SMS. Didn't manage to sleep in during the holidays at all except Thursday when I had the whole day free and spent it doing homework. Can.you.imagine. Surviving on bread for breakfast + lunch. Ohwell. Woke up early tday for tuition, bought takeaway, came home, headed out for gym for an hour.

228 kcal plus 186kcal from some other machine I don't know what but, I burnt 414kcal and probably gained it back during dinner 'cos there wasn't soup to drink or fruits to eat instead of durian and Mom doesn't allow me to skip ._. Then lazed around before going to Nik's hse to assist for viewing and back home to shower and such before going out for dinner and now I'm beat. & I didn't touch school homework at all tday. How nice.

My eyes are closing but I ain't sleeping though I'm on my bed. I have to finish my half done English compre + inference qns, Math notes, Chem notes and a Physics WS. And IF I do become smarter suddenly after eating durians, complete the few qns I didn't know how to do for Math WS. THEN, I'll have to discuss Lit presentation details with the rest and produce some research work for it BEFORE I can sleep soundly for school the next day WHICH I don't think is gna be the case SO I should just enjoy the remaining holiday left and get my butt kicked for school. The end.

World Water Day is tmr and..I'm to tired to actually bother anymore in contrast to the excitement I felt 'cos I would get to check out Asics shoes. And well now..I'm not gna touch work either 'cos Imma produce crap if I do.

Always look on, the bright side of life

2011-03-15T20:58:00.002+08:00

Kiss you goodbye,

Isn't that solo great. I am not at all a Leeteuk bias but his solo performance rly touched me ^^ Singing in Chinese for Taiwanese fans and his pronunciation was quite accurate ! At least I could make out most part of the song. Though the end was a little bit cheesy but I was just looking at him the whole time. He has a great voice, he should get more lines :B

Okay just checked my results on ntrix and geez, I need to work harder for EM, Chem and Lit cos other than that my placings are below 10. HOWEVER, my L1R5 is 16. Okay I must improve by MYEs. Though I didn't get higher than my brother for L1R5, I ought to get lower :x Daaaaamn. I should start preparing for the new term soon.

Okay other than that, MLP today wasnt as bad as I expected. Just really time consuming. Reached late but haven't started. Only 14 people came today and 2 left halfway ._. So we reformed groups for storyboard. Poster's supposedly due tmr but I wouldn't be going so I ain't doing. Our facilitator was rly nice ! I mean, the one other than the lady :x Maybe cos he was younger and there wasn't any generation gap and he understands how it feels attending a programme we didn't want to so he entertained us most of the time hahaha ! Only the morning was a bit boring. And because of that horror clip I'm pretty jumpy and sensitive to noises around the house now. It was kinda freaky. Bleh.

Anyway, skipping MLP tmr for training ! LLK said we could. Yay awesome possum. Umum, I haven't rly finished any homework. I've only uploaded stuff on wiki for GE, so I'm done for that. Handed in my Math notes HW tday. That's all. So much more to complete when my holidays are packed. Ottoke.

Imma sleep early tday else I'd be so tired for tmr's trng and get dizzy during warm up again. So I shall do work and pack for tmr for the remaining 50 mins before attempting to go to bed :B

Prayers

2011-03-14T22:53:00.003+08:00

Japan, the land of the rising sun, may you overcome your difficulties with a strong mindset. Always keep the faith, the world is praying for you and spreading their love and warmth to you ! Don't give up !!

I rly pity them, watching the news everyday ): How can such a beautiful country face this kinda disaster srsly. I'm just thankful of how fortunate I am to be still living when a 15 year old Hae biased ELF passed away in the disaster. RIP ! I too hope Hae's father will give you a warm hug in heaven. Sigh. Alright. So the holidays are here, or perhaps that's an overstatement because it doesn't even seem like holidays. I have to reach school by 8am on Mon, Tues, probably Wed, and Fri. I have to wake early for tuition on Sat and Daddy day on Sun. The only day I can sleep in is Thur ): This rly sucks. I want a nice and good holiday ugh !! And because of this I usually bum around till late at home using my phone and procrastinating. The only hol homework I've completed is the Math notes. Suck much.

Trng tday was pretty sian. My legs were reluctant to move. This is so irritating. Oh and my spiking is fcking deteriorating. Even without jumping and just standing there I can't even get the timing. I only get my piaks when I spike against the walls. Argh I hate this. Okay basically I'm in a real lousy mood cos of MLP tmr. Why oh whyyyyyy. I'm just ranting on and on over here but I don't care huhu. Maybe I should come up with a genius excuse tmr and leave early. Hee. I've decided to go there without my poster or storyboard done. Ohwell.

Ohoh ! I've got myself a pair of rly nice beige-brown shorts from Miss Selfridge. It's pretty ex but the quality's good :x Plus I bought new shoes in far east ! I rly like my new shoes ! I mean, finally something different than the black and gray flats I wear all the time. I thought Mom didn't like me wearing those kinda shoes but hey, she chose it for me ^^ plus, far east shoes = cheap. Awesome.

Okay. This random post is leading to nowhere. I'm just typing cos I don't wna sleep early though I know I'd regret tmr morning. Ohwait, actually there's alot of SJ stuff I have in mind but since I'm not on the comp and I can't embed videos then .. :\

Dear Lord,
I pray that you will help the people in Japan. Give them the strength to overcome the tough times. Help lost families reunite. Help the country regain their power. Help the government to organize the country soon and restore their country. Help them to be able to feel the warmth and love from countries all around the world and from there give them the courage to keep their heads up. I pray for you to watch over them and the health and safety of the survivors. I commit their country into your hands and in your name I pray, amen.

Sweat, grime and dirt.

2011-03-09T20:24:00.002+08:00

I AM HOME, with proper bitter gourd soup for dinner and a nice cold shower after accumulating dirt for 27 hours. I feel sooooooooo good.

Firstly, CGVB IS THROUGH TO THE NEXT ROUND YAHOO ! Monday when the cohort was assembling for OAC we had to attend some workshop in school and report at normal school time to prepare presentation on some Tourism Innovation thinghy. But the whole workshop wasn't exactly too bad. Plus, the team's company was pretty entertaining. Had training after that, ended early and went home to pack for OAC.

The poverty simulation game thinghy on Tuesday was so fun srsly. Especially during presentation when we typed 'Pubic Performance' instead of 'Public Performance' and when Gwy screwed up her lines hehe :B Left halfway and met the rest before leaving for PHS. The team played really well against PHS. Like finally for once, standing outside of court, I could see their desire to win the crucial game against a formidable team and yes, we did it. We nailed it. IT WAS AWESOME. Aced tgt at the end, hugged here and there and ladi-lada abit before rushing home to prepare for OAC cos we had to reach by 6pm.

Reached home at 4.30pm, showered in 10 mins, did some last minute packing and drying my hair and by 5pm Mom was driving me to Vivo already since she had to reach airport by 5.30pm :\ Ended up being early and walking around Vivo to find water bottle for Leng and then met them at mrt, before busing there. Stopped at wrong stop, walked in wrong alleys, by the time we reached there we were sweating already. Joined our class and waited for them to shower before having dinner, then going for campfire whereby I was so darn blur cos I've yet to learn anything yet ._.

Big sweep on the third day tday was ridiculous. 24 people, clean 3 toilets, in less than 15 minutes, with insufficient logistics. You tell me how. Wasn't in a good mood anyway since OAC had been so boring and I had to wash the toilet which I didn't really use except the sink. I didn't even pee there. Kept getting rushed to do it faster but argh srsly. After camp had lunch tgt with team again before having training = sweat and accumulate more dirt. Training was quite boring, in fact I don't feel like playing on anymore.

Anyway bottom line: I'm clean.

TGIF ♥

2011-03-04T21:54:00.002+08:00

At least something went right today,
I woke up at 5.30am and I. was. fcking. late. for. school. Can you believe it. I feel so irritated. I did packed my bag, iron my clothes, got ready for school, woke up on time, but couldn't take bus and reach on time. And then when we were late I had to settle everything even if it wasn't my fault and I don't know I should stop before I end up cursing. I'm annoyed at the fact I did nothing wrong but I already got a mark for being late in term one. This, is ttly unfair. But nevermind, forgive and forget, my anger will cool off sometime. Poor Mom. Thankfully she got to a patrol kiosk on time else I can't imagine her panicking inside her broken down vehicle.

Reached school, and everyone was going back to class from morning assembly so thankfully I wasn't thaaaaat late. Just late to have skipped follow up spot check. Recess was like, suddenly so awkward. I don't know why. Maybe it's just me but, I don't feel like we're close anymore. Lessons were okay, after recess I just felt sleepy during Math and took damn long to do Math cos I kept dozing off halfway while doing it and writing rubbish. Time whizzed past quickly, and then training started in the rainy weather.

Start of training jiaolian was in a pretty good mood heheh. Anyway sec 3s practically self trained under jiaolian's supervision for awile until seniors came and training 'officially' started. Spent the first half assisting for training and the next half playing with juniors with some of the other sec 3s and IT WAS RLY FUN !! Played double setter with Leng and it's so fun it's so fun hehehe ! After so long, we finally won both sets from the juniors, I feel so embarrassed yet proud haha. After we were done joined the b'div for free spike which had lasted altogether 35 mins for them ._. but we had it easier teheh. No match today, that was it. End of training.

Got picked home again :B Mom's out so I'm alone and I cleaned up my room. I feel good. I should start on homework, or at least finish tuition homework for tmr. Speaking of tuition, I barely passed my Chinese, by 3 marks. I suck.

Please, adopt a sense of urgency.

我想抓住命运的勇气

2011-03-03T20:59:00.002+08:00

Cedar Steady, ACE !

Short day in school today. It was just Physics, AM and EM period then OAC camp briefing before going for recess and from there changing and camwhoring and blah blah until we boarded the bus to PHS. A really short day tday. I'm just rly worried I missed Chem period, not so worried about MT period though hehe :x

Alright, our match timing got swapped. Played against Hua Yi tday and you guys played well by pulling the scores apart ! (: I got abit confused for the first part of the match for ball picking and kept rolling the balls everywhere hehe but got the hang of it after awile :B Anyway tday was not too bad, we just have to try our best for PHS next Tuesday and I believe if they play like how they did tday, we can fight it out ! C'mon guys, it's your stage, do your bestttt !

After that went to AMK hub with most of the sec 3s for lunch @ Subway again. I'm starting to grow rly fond of that place. Pigged out on cookies with Jasmine, took pictures with the newly discovered app that Cherie downloaded which everyone started following as well haha. Then went home. I forgot I was taking the loop bus and I fell asleep ._. So when I woke up I had to take the overhead bridge again mehhhhh.

TMR'S A FRIDAY ! YAY FINALLY !

Am I changing ?

We came together amidst the many people to form this team of ours,

& I want to bravely grab on to our Destiny.

For all that I've done, I wna do something right.

2011-02-27T01:03:00.002+08:00

A Math date, mashed with lots of tears and emotions.

Went to Parkway to prepare for AM CT on Tuesday with Mel tday. Started well, just the 2 of us pulling out hair to solve this and that. But well, after awile somehow or another it just led to us talking about volleyball and school and families and basically just..life. Never talked face to face with someone about problems like these before, not even Mom or Dad, and it felt good that I could just let it out like that. So I feel light today.

I think sometimes, the problems I'm facing now have only myself to blame. I brought the stress from volleyball upon myself, 'cos I made the choice of going against Mom and choosing the CCA. Yet I'm not doing well. I made the choice of going against Mom and choosing to take Literature, instead of trying out for Trip Science. Yet I don't see how I'm gna do well for the first and easiest CT.

For all the things that I've done wrong, I must have done something right. But no, since when did I do something right.

Rambled on and on and decided to stop studying and left coffee bean to have comfort food :B

Left after that and went back home. And without giving me time to digest the conversation I had with Mel, she went on to tell me about stuff I've been imagining in my head for awile now. Now its 1.13am, and the 3 of us went to get midnight Udders ice cream. This warmth, I'm not sure if its the same as the one I felt years ago. Of course, seeing Mom is happy and seeing that the picture looks more complete than just the 2 of us, it doesn't feel thaaaaat bad. But I mean, I had really wished for the 4 of us to come back together again someday.

So, if things work out, I'll have to learn how to squeeze you into our little picture.

Sure, you dote on me, alot. But it just feels..

I.am.pissed.

2011-02-18T23:09:00.002+08:00

Fcking pissed.

I come home from a long day at school. On the way home you describe how I live this boring and mundane life I have. You see me browsing the net on my phone and ask me what I'm doing. I'm done showering and I get my weekly dose of youtube and you tell me "Don't keep watching this until 2am or 3am in the morning and get ugly eyebags. You don't need to sleep meh ? Your test don't score well how ?" I'm sorry I can't study like how crazy you describe it to your friends, okay ? If that's an ideal daughter to you, who has no life and stays at home all day to study, and not go out at all then I'm sorry I can't fulfill that.

When I pack the room and pack clothes, you see me doing chores, you get me to help you wash the dishes you were lazy to wash 2 days ago. Be nice, and tell me you'll wash it in front of your friends. When they're gone, you just leave it and get me to wash it. For once I thought you were so nice to be cooking. But if you're gna cook and make me wash up after you then DON'T.EVER. cook again. My guests come and I clean up after them so YOU do the same too. Don't just leave it in the damn sink and go out to party and come back at some unearthly hour.

Don't give me the excuse of viewings and ask me to go to the library to study. Since when were you so generous with freedom anyway ? Even if I do, stop coming up with excuses to stop me from coming home 'cos I know something's going on in there.

AND YOU, though I don't see you often, you'd better STOP using MY name to get your name known among your seniors and raise your popularity or wtv. They were my freaking schoolmates, not someone you can use to solve problems you create.

Champions in our hearts,

2011-02-16T21:56:00.002+08:00

So finals today didn't turn out to be what we expected, but nevertheless, we held our high to receive the silver trophy.

We played the first set well of course, and we did it. But then the supporters of the opposing school came and they were definitely being assholes. Guess they got affected by the crowd since. But I really was praying so hard for them, to be able to play up to their max potential and execute smooth moves. Frankly speaking, I'm already disgusted by the colour combi of your school uniform, plus your jeers and distractions that's gna affect the play of MY teammates, sorry I can't let it go. Yeah I may sound big now, but I srsly felt like giving you guys the finger. It's rly irritating how you're doing that. Didn't you guys get educated on sportsmanship ? We may have the lost the game, but we won because we fought back till the v end using all that sportsmanship that you've lost. Srsly, why couldn't you just shut the fck up about our play ? You think it's fun ? Well now you know it isn't when you guys lost the guys match. It's ttly not. Inhumane people.

We've tried our best we ended with no regrets we did what we could and what's done is done. We'll look up and never look down, look forward and never backward. This is not the end, in fact our journey has just begun. Come on, we'll get back stronger and show the rest what we've been trng and working hard for, we'll show them who's boss.

I prayed and prayed. I thought for a long time, before I said "Dear Lord, it's okay if I don't get into the main 12 for Nationals, o just want you to help the team to victory. The match is theirs and they deserve it." But he didn't took my prayer. Nevertheless, I'm proud to be a part of CGVB, and you guys are forever champions in my heart. Let's go team.

It has to be you

2011-02-12T01:39:00.003+08:00

I MISS SS3 ALOT ALOT especially Yesung's perfect solo. Though he wasn't my bias but I really miss his solo stage. I didn't know he looked so handsome in person tooooooo ! His voice together with the audiences in the stadium was really beautiful I felt so proud to be part of it ! Of course, Kyu did a great great great job singing his Mandarin song. Those talented boys, ah.

Okay anyway I have nothing to blog about. Everyday has been the same, just that tomorrow I'm going for a study date with Sinyeeeee ! Like omg yes, its been a long time since I went out T^T Common tests start next week so I should better start doing at least something, especially for SS test on Tuesday.

Till then !

Hae

2011-02-03T22:38:00.004+08:00

I'm not gna bash Hara cos I mean, they look so good together :3

Conclusion: Donghae is so handsomeeeeeeeeeeeee.

It's been awile

2011-02-02T18:18:00.002+08:00

Alright, so today's CNY celebration in school was pretty fun. The more fun one out of the 3 years I've experienced :B I'm a happy girl today.

Reached school, morning assembly followed by class party. Our class suddenly felt so bonded it was fun ! After that we had yu sheng, and then went all over to place taking pictures with people ! Hehe. Btw, the yu sheng was like really good, though there weren't any fish ): Went back to hall after for celebrations and stayed back abit to take pics with clique againnnnn ah I miss them so muchhh :3 Stayed in school to finish up last scene for Lit and then crapped all over the whiteboard with Jasmine before going home heheh so fun !

Came home, took a shower, then went to Parkway to shop for New Year clothes. Surprisingly Parkway has alot of nice clothes and I finished shopping in 4 hours. Power seh. Hehe. Feels good, haven't shopped in the longest time. Last time I did I bought a skirt from vivo after walking for several hours ._.

Bottom line, MY BRADUH IS BACK. And leaving on the 5th again ): Hai anyway he bought a birthday gift for me from China and I love it alot ! A pretty pretty necklace I shall take a picture of it soon ! ^^

Its rare for the family to be in Singapore on a special occasion, I wna have a reunion dinner with all 4 of us together ):

SUPERB SUPER SHOW 3

2011-01-31T22:36:00.008+08:00

Okay actually I intend to go on a really really long fan account of my 2 days there. But since the 2nd night was really more worth it and fun I shall elaborate more on that then :B

1st Night, 29th Jan:

It was Ju's Mom free tickets ! And those were stage facing tickets with fantastic view but little interaction. Ju and I regretted not bringing out cameras 'cos we thought the guards were really strict and we should just enjoy the show but..the 1st show was really meant for video taking. We were kinda early but when we reached the towels and files were sold out so we only got the personal bromides :\

Nothing really special except for the fact that Kyu and I made eye contact when he was singing his ballad 'cos apparently alot ran down to wave at him while I remained in my seat and so I guess I was pretty noticeable hehehehe ^^

2nd Night, 30th Jan:

The night whereby we bought the tickets ourselves ! ^^ This was the queue to buy merchandise and we were kinda late 'cos we went to comics connection before that to search for lightsticks but they were sold out D: So we bought the fan balloons instead. Reaching around less than half an hour before the show, everything was sold out except post cards and Shindong files so I didn't buy anything that day.

See the terrace at the top. It was half empty so sad ): But other than that the crowd was superb compared to the previous night's dead crowd although it was sold out. We were at least 5 times louder ! :D The atmosphere was really high and the seats were really fantastically good ! The overall view wasn't so nice but it sure was worth it for the run-around songs.

Okay the photos are a little jumbled up here. Anyway, thats the stickies we bought from 2 girls who were selling while we were queueing to buy merchandise ! A pack for 5$. Initially we were having doubts as to whether we should buy but we tried it and it wasn't so bad. So I suggested getting one pack to throw on stage nyeheh.

Thought I don't know what the Korean words are on the packet but I guess it made quite an impact hehe cos when I threw it in front of Shindong (Yeah I was accurate, really accurate), he picked it up, looked at it for while, then looked at our side to see who was the one and then gave a thumbs up sign. And yeah, I smiled like an idiot back at him and gave him a (Y) !

The concert was really good. Too good I don't know how to describe. The opening was really powerful. The first time I saw Donghae flew up he really looked like an angel. Maybe its because of the lightings and the fact he's wearing white and flying, but he really looked good !! And his face was flawless. Flawless. Anyway the opening was the remix of Sorry Sorry and damn it it was really good. All of them looked great they look so handsome in person !! Even better in person than on tv hehe ^^

Forgot what was the setlist like but I missed capturing the flying part on my camera 'cos of the guards. That part was the best ): Donghae bb got all the flying parts hehe :B

After awile they switched to ballads and when Donghae sang the first line he looked so gorgeous sitting with the rest of them :3 HOW I LOVE IT WHEN MY BB GETS TO START THE SONG AND HAS MORE THAN ONE LINE.

Siwon decided to ruin the Eunhae moment by pouncing on my poor bb awww. But they sang All My Heart really well ! It was my favourite ballad and I was happily bouncing up and down to the extent whereby I hit Ju's camera which was above my head hehe !!

Kyuhyun came over to our side alot. He came alot, Eunhyuk tooooo !! Donghae went to flirt with the other side of the stadium ): I was so looking forward to seeing Donghae live in person but I only managed to catch a close glimpse or two because he only came when they walked together in the beginning and at the end ): Oh well, Kyuhyun did quite a good job replacing him and I think Kyuhyun has become my bias too. He is so pure and cute and handsome and gentlemanly, AND SO SWEET. He put his mic down so he could greet the fans properly with both hands going "Ahnneonghasayo" repeatedly but he got tired after awile and just went "Ahnneong" meep :3 Yesung and Kyuhyun came just in front of us and blew bubbles and they were so close walking up and down I could feel myself smelling them. (Okay, too much.)

He took a selca with the phone of the girl standing 2 places beside me !! I was hoping he'd grab my phone seriously. It was BLUE !! Man okay nevermind. Highlight: I touched his hand !! It was that moment when I felt the concert wasnt a dream. I'm meeting them live. I'm seeing their actual living bodies running around the stadium like little kids and playing with the fans. Neoumu kyeopta !!

They came out for encore for both nights !! And Bonamana was really a blast. It made the stadium go wild and the fanchants were so cool !! Heechul must be feeling so proud of himself. Someone made a flag with his Chinese name character and he starting walking around the stadium with it. Haha that dork. He came really near and he has really good milky complexion !! So everything on tv wasn't a lie. "Saranghaeyo Kim Heechul, Milky White Skin Kim Heechul !!" Haha I remembered everything ^^ He made us say that during member introduction haha ! ^^

In fact I have alot of videos of their close ups but they were pretty ruined by screaming. Managed to capture Siwon's, Sungmin's, Eunhyuk's, Ryeowook's, Leeteuk's, Yesung's, Shindong's and Kyuhyun's close up really well !! The catwalk stage was really useful !! I think our side was pretty well liked haha ! Some fan gave Eunhyuk a big pack of wang wang biscuits and he ate it on stage and threw some to the fans. Despite his big muscles he was still struggling to open a packet to eat. He'll always be my anchovy, ah. How cute.

Alright, apart from jumping and bouncing up and down to songs, singing alot and screaming for Donghae. There's nothing much I can remember. Rest are in the videos I took which I'll probably put up on fb soon when I'm free. My digital camera's memory card was full by the 3rd song can you believe it ._. So I had to use my phone for the rest of the concert which doesn't allow me to zoom in T^T Took some of their solo performances but they were really far. Eunhae's solo would forever be placed 1st (Y) Although Donghae didnt strip like he did in Seoul and only unbuttoned aww. I remembered watching Sungmin's like that --> O.O and Yesung's solo was great cos the hall sang together with him ^^ I wonder if the rest of them heard it backstage haha :B

I've had alot of Suju goodness over the weekend, I still have the feeling I'll see them again cos of Leeteuk's "Seeyou tomorrow !!" on Saturday. Siwon was also rly cute asking if we wna go to church with him on Sunday haha ! Being the shisus he is, he sang a worship song for his solo ^^ Henry's solo was also really good !! He got the whole stadium high with his piano and dancing and singing !! He's the next dancing machine. DAEBAK !

I typed everything without sequencing them hehe. I just typed whatever came to my mind xD Anyway the ending was really cute. Henry, Zhoumi and Jungmo all came out together too !! HENRY ANNOUNCED SJM'S COMEBACK SOON !! Although I want Hangeng to come back together soon, but I guess their comeback means appearances on Taiwan tv shows (:

Leeteuk: ELFs kamsahamnida !! Singapore ELFs, Thailand ELFs, Indonesia ELFs, Phillipine ELFs, Japan ELFs, Korea ELFs..!

-Donghae interrupts-

Donghae: AND AMERICA AND ENGLAND AND PARIS AND INTERNATIONAL AIRLINE (and he adds in alot of gibberish till someone shuts him up HAHA MY BABY ♥)

Donghae was in a really good mood though, he was sniffing the first night. So he stayed a little longer the second night and was the last to go backstage !

Donghae: Give me the music ! Now its dance party time !!

When all of the members went back alr haha ! :3

THANK YOU SUJU !! YOU'VE MADE MY WEEKEND !!

URI SUPER JUNI-OR !!

Hae

2011-01-29T16:24:00.002+08:00

Okay so I haven't blogged in a really long time. But that doesn't matter 'cos everyday has been the same. Since today is special, I decided to log in. HEHE.

Okay so I've been waiting for this day since the start of the year. And I've been wanting this week in school to pass by quickly and it somehow did. Next I wanted Friday to end fast for Saturday to come. Which it did too, cos training went on pretty well. Played 1 set but I think I played it well. Plus, we gave jiaolian the build a bear teddy bear and he was in a good mood throughout training, WOO.

Now that Saturday is here. I went reluctantly for tuition. And the moment I sat down I just wanted it to end. Spent the last hour writing compo. Writing compo makes time past v fast, neoumu chowa, I like. Then now I'm all ready for SS3, HOHO ! Alright Mom just ruined my attire by claiming that putting on a belt is nicer, but I look REALLY awkward, really. Whatever, I probably take it off at the concert venue :x

I'm excited I don't know how to express myself. Moshpit queue started at 9am today but Singaporeans queued overnight ._. And there are people handing out freebies starting at 12pm, and we're gna celebrate Kyuhyun's birthday, and I'm gna be part of a Ryeowook fan project despite how badly I wna participate in Hae's. K nevermind, it's gna be fun. I'm so talkative today hehehehehhehee. Seriously hope they'll be in a good mood. A damn good mood. But on the other hand I kinda think Heechul's still mad ):

Okay nevermind. I will enjoy myself today, see and fall in love with plenty plenty plenty guys who are prettier than me, stare at Hae guns which I hard is pretty attention grabbing (I mean c'mon. Yknow it.), see lots of Eunhae fanservice and buy merchandise ! I really do hope the merchandise aren't sold out. People went so damn early and its 4.30pm and I'm still home. Save me at least one lightstick omg ):

SEE YOU LATER, DONGHAE !

Happy Birthday

2011-01-18T22:23:00.005+08:00

Why must there be the word 'happy' in front of birthdays ? Was it meant to be like that or was it made up by someone who thought everyone should be happy on this special day.

Woke up to my brother's and Mom's birthday wish. I miss my brother. Ju overslept again so cabbed. Anyway school wasn't very special, just the same old routine. I find it so sickening. Was tired and my eyes were red and I hated it. Every now and then the thought of it would sink back in when everyone includes vball in their birthday wishes. And that's also when I stop reading.

Lessons went pass pretty quickly today. School dismissed, waited for Ju and then went to Parkway and had Sakae. After which went to comics connection and take a look at sj goods. Their balloon, costs 5$ each, can you believe it. Sigh. What if it bursts. Browsed through photocards and we secretly hid the nice nice Donghae one, hopefully it'll still be there on Thursday. Got ice cream after that and walked around abit before going home and reading cards and unwrapping gifts. Was so full from all that food and 1.5 hours later Mom brought me out for dinner which I barely touched. Anyway thank you to the people who send me well wishes, gave me gifts and cards and Ju who went out with me (:

I blew out my candles and I'm not sure if I made the right wish. Ohwait, do wishes come true ? No. Just keep dreaming. My birthday is going to end soon meaning tmr is nearing. I'm dreading it. The feeling's gna haunt me again. It won't get out of my mind. It bothers me in lessons too and I can't concentrate and I just suddenly have teary eyes and the teacher thinks I'm mental. School dismissed at 10am+ and I have to stay there cos we're leaving for peicai at 1.30pm. When I could be at home doing something more productive. It feels so horrible. I'm just gna watch them war, not being able to do anything. Fck it. Why is my birthday like that WHY. Yeah school just makes me feel better but honestly I can't get rid of my thoughts.

I'm so upset and disappointed I can't even type properly I don't know where this post is going. I sound like a crybaby, whining and all but its not like I like it and I'm doing it on purpose. Honestly this sucks I'm irritated at myself. Why why why why someone tell me why. The eve was bad and though I rly wna just enjoy tday I can't. I rly didn't have a happy birthday. I hated it. But I had to pretend otherwise. Just add a little more exclamation marks, a heart and smiley, and everything would loom alright.

Wouldn't it be cool to die on your birthday,

Clicks better without me

2011-01-17T19:56:00.003+08:00

Guess I wasn't mentally prepared enough.

I have tons of questions bombarding my head, I don't know what to do now. I shouldn't be in this mess now. Didn't I tell myself to accept whatever that'll come to me. Why am I like that. Why am I crying like I lost my home, why am I wetting my laptop with meaningless tears.

There's nothing I can say, there's nothing I can do.

There's no other way.

Keep your head down

2011-01-12T22:08:00.003+08:00

I like that song and I've been hearing it pretty often cos Mom's watching the drama 'Athena: Goddess of War' or something and they're using it as it's theme song. Speaking of which, I have no time to watch Hae anymore, except the weekends ):

Anyway it's the second week of term one and I think I have gotten a littleeee closer to my classmates but its still quite weird geez. Have been doing well in lessons and paying attention and I finally managed to understand Physics. Math has been going pretty good for now I'm quite worried about my Chem and SS. I have my Chrysalids to read for Lit and I'm not interested in it :x I'm dead.

Training on Monday and today went on pretty nicely. Have been playing spiker more often now and I hardly play subset anymore. Apart from the fear of spiking into the net, I think it's much easier to play spiker. Besides, there's more movement too and at least I feel tired and productive. Wore jersey today for training to 'test it out' and get used to it. It really is comfortable and I don't have to worry about my panties being revealed anymore (HEH) but its awkward cos I feel like I'm naked down there. Improved in my spiking today and I'm rly happy !! :B Glad that I'm starting to show something other than my air balls at least.

Sec 3 life has been pretty tiring and the same mundane routine repeats everyday. Come home and get my work done/study and by the time its 10pm I'm tired alr. Hm. There's jogging and Math lecture tmr. Jogging is much more organized now.

Nights !
Imam consider swimming to get a nice firm ass.

I'm tired

2011-01-08T19:15:00.004+08:00

1st week of school is over and I'm pretty tired, probably because my body isn't used to it yet. Feeling sleeping in class and then bending down to my bag and take something out so it keeps me awake, stuff like that.

This week went by quickly, 'cos everyday feels like I'm preparing for common tests whatsoever, the same old routine. Aish, 3S is still pretty awkward I have to seek help from Jasmine and still go for recess tgt with clique :x Our class is so rojak that we have to keep moving around the school and go to different classes for lessons. It's getting pretty harsh with daily homework, lessons, trainings, lectures, tutorials. I feel so grown up hahaha :B Ohwell, for the weekend I'm more or less done with homework. I have 3 damn qns for Math notes I don't know how to do, plus English which I will finish later then I'll start doing textbook and reading Physics and Lit for the quiz on Monday. Hai.

Competitions are starting soon on the 17th, and so I've been trying harder during trainings to play up to my utmost potential. I sleep early the night before, try to cut down on my diet except days where I have mens, maintain good mood and be more active during training. 2 of us are gonna be put out and I have a feeling I'll be one of them. Either that or I'll not be making it through nationals as well. I've seriously been trying so hard. But when jiaolian comes on court to play I just lose it and get all stressed up. Putting me in the team and expecting me to play up to your standard and not make mistakes and put blames on me. Isn't this training, where we learn from mistakes. Why do you always expect things right from the beginning ? I'm sorry I may look ignorant and stubborn on the outside 'cos that's how my face looks like, but really, you don't know how hard I'm trying to hold it back inside of me and correct myself. I know I'm a lousy player compared to the rest, and it's not like you don't know it either, but why do you come in and join the team to play and expect me to play just as well ? Because you want to win the set ? I'm putting in effort and I'm sorry if I'm pulling us down but I really try. I can't even communicate with the players properly. Some mistakes are my fault and I apologise and am willing to accept the scolding but when you fcking shout at me like that when it isn't even my fault in the first place makes me reaaaally pissed and I mean it but because I respect you I can't rebel and it's not like I can keep holding these feelings inside. Ya right, enjoy the game and play happily ? I can't with all these stress your presence and the look you show me gives me. You don't know how hard I'm training, how much I'm trying behind your back, how hard I'm praying, the sweat and blood I'm shedding.

I'm just a kid, and I'm tired.

I'm just a kid, and I'm really tired.

HERE I COME FISHY

2011-01-02T22:21:00.004+08:00

Current mood: Daebak !

'Cos I'm finally getting the chance to meet my 2 biases kaching ! Did alot of enquiring concerning the tickets and well, after seeing how behind the 161$ tickets are, Mom is talking about how ridiculous it is for a row 33 ticket to be priced like that. Thanks to Uncle Raphael who offered to sponsor half the price, Mom totally allowed me to get the row 11 tickets for 225$ !!! Woohoo best birthday present everrrrrrrrr.

So did last minute changes again and waiting for the person to get back to us. Julia is srsly the most 'on' person I've seen to immediately agree to a 225$ ticket without needing to ask permission, coolio. I'm gna hunt for a good camera since those seats are facing the stage.

I AM EXCITED !

Happy 4th :B

Happy New Year

2011-01-01T15:39:00.002+08:00

The usual common phrase: "Time flies, in a blink of an eye, a year has passed !"

Didn't go out to countdown or anything for today, stayed home alone watching 2010 GDA awards from 11.30pm till 2.50am and cried. Oh how lame am I. So I used the photo I took at MBR last year. Sapphire blue to be reborn this year as an E.L.F. ! :B Well actually I don't like that name but whatever its okay since they came up with it hehe.

Went out for dinner with Mom, Mom became a fan of SJ on our way home cos I was playing their songs on my iPod whereby she just suddenly found interest in them after I've been doing this for about a month ._. Okay, bottom line is (and probably greatest news to start New Year), MOM DON'T MIND ME GOING FOR SS3 THIS JANUARY !! Found someone selling a pair of side by side tickets on livejournal and only one person commented asking to swap. So I THINK its still available. So JU CAN YOU PLEASE LEMME KNOW IF YOU'RE GOING ALONE ? I'm asking everywhere I can, srsly.

It's already Saturday, school is starting on Tuesday. I'm starting on my Math and doing well so far :B Haha ! I'm lazy to do a post reflecting on what I've done last year, or my resolutions for next year :x I'll just probably sort it out in my head.

Happy New Year everyone ! I'm gna be a more hardworking person this year and show better results in my studies and spend less time on the computer hehe ! Please stay healthy and tkcare ! God Bless !

Ohoh ! Happy New Year Donghae ♥

Tick tock

2010-12-29T17:58:00.002+08:00

Time is passing so quickly, its already Wednesday and I have about almost a week left to finish up my Math homework.

It's been a looooooooooooooooooooooooong time since I stepped into a mall and yesterday we went to Vivo woohooo ! Love this season when everything's on sale ! Prices for clothes are cut down by like 40$, awesome or what. Cotton on had 50% off everything, and I bought a skirt from Pull and Bear and the price was cut by 10$ ! Ah, christmas. Went to Adidas in hope of seeing a nice haversack but to no avail, so in the end Mom said she'll take me to Taka when she's free 'cos that's where the shop is humongous ! Like all the brands together, where I bought my Puma teeeheee :B

After that went to AMK Macs to drink and talk, nothing much except I saw someone that looked really really really chaoji alike with Kibum. Their face is like exactly the same just that he has mild acne. Omg why am I describing men's skin here. Got home late and slept around 1am T^T

Training was nothing much. Now that we have almost full force for training, I'm off to play at cdiv side and though I played spiker but it was boring. Can't get used to spiking, it's so irritating. Timing everything all feels so weird. Uguhguh. Lunched aft training ! It's been awile ^^ Okay I'm off to continue watching 'It's Okay, Daddy's Daughter', it's rly rly good, cause Donghae's in it ! Kidding, I mean it's really good.

My neck hurts from sleeping on the bus ride home.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T21:35:00.004+08:00

& a Happy New Year.

Red and Green,

Reindeers,

Gingerbread man,

Decorated pine trees,

Socks,

Turkey.

There's none of it this year.

Yesterday night I counted down to christmas myself, watched Attack of the Pin-up Boys before sleeping and today I stayed home all day preparing meals for myself. What a Christmas. Okay anyway I talked to Sinyee recently again ! Like back to the old days where we not only 'discuss' about cute guys, but other stuff too hehe :B

Anyway I'm getting more and more lazy to update my blog, not that I know of many who read it but still. Anyway yesterday's training was nothing much. Only 8 people came, plus 2 seniors. Well, training never felt so empty and I'm starting to worry about how we're gna do next year. Didn't spike well yesterday. I'm totally losing the timing and everything. And yeah, I can't jump high. Well if I try to jump high, I can't estimate the height well and lose timing. If I don't jump, I can't get a nice ball over. Perhaps spiking's not my thing.

Jiaolian and Mr Lee joined us for game. First few sets went on quite well, but the last set was when I couldn't communicate with jiaolian :\ Honestly I felt that my overall performance was not too bad but some points I lost were wasted, I could totally save the point then ): Other than that, I felt so lonely playing on court yesterday. Only Cherie was from bdiv on the same team and it honestly felt so pressurising but I'm glad I put up a rather decent performance. I really wna do better.

Anyway a picture of Sunday's outing, since its rare I make a trip down to Sentosa for a breather haha. Man made beaches are pretty.

Have been trying to start a work out schedule. Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays shall be self training: 200 receiving, 200 setting, 100 upperhand, 50 spikes, 3 sets of lunges and squats before running 1.6km. Well it's been a long time since I last ran so decided not to start off with a lot. Next week shall move on to 2km (:

Hopefully, I'll lose some weight before height and weight taking next year.

WEIGHT

2010-12-20T21:57:00.002+08:00

I NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT I DON'T CARE.

Mr Chan said my ass is getting heavier so I can't jump high and spike properly.

Not that I disagree but. Omg this is so embarrassing. So from tmr onwards I'll head to the gym on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays starting off with 1.6km plus self trng before/after that :x Nowadays when we have to go out I look in the mirror and feel so damn depressed 'cos I haven't been going shopping for the second half of the year and looking ugly when wearing my old clothes just ruins my mood 'cos I've grown bigger. I'm gna lose at least 2kg till the new year, 'cos once school starts, there's no more time for gym. And CNY is coming soon in February so I have to slim down.

Psh. Anyway today's trng wasn't so great. My receiving today is like so shit. Didn't play B side, 'cos seniors came today. But today my servicing was pretty stable ^^ I want to jump higher I wna do gym again. I find that the exercises Mr Lee makes us do isn't as effective as doing weights ): The gym in my condo doesn't have weight machines for legs, only arms and I don't want big arms. I want strong legs.

Okay maybe I should continue doing yoga every night.

What if

2010-12-15T23:06:00.004+08:00

Tonight, I feel so lonely.

Tonight, I'm listening to ballads.

Tonight, its raining, all the more I feel lonelier.

I'm sitting at my study table with my almost completed 报章报道 in front of me. But then it started to rain and the wind feels good. I'm not sleepy, just exhausted. The environment's good now, great for studying too. But theres this indescribable feeling about, I also don't know what actually.

Weather at nights like this are rly great for self reflection and studying but I have been spending them on the computer for the whole of my holiday wasting them away. Now I'm only left with about half a month before school reopens and I have tons of work left and I'm not exaggerating. I've been playing too much. Clique outing on Monday and I haven't asked Mom about it plus vb chalet on Tuesday which I haven't asked about too but I don't know if I wna go.

Had friendly today with Punggol and didn't get a chance to play spiker although I really wanted to. Played subset for 2 sets whereby I pretty much put up an unstable performance for the 1 set. 2nd set was better but it wasn't my fullest potential. I've got a lot on my mind now concerning volleyball I don't know where to start. I'm trying to figure out what's going on in jiaolian's brain about what he's up to concerning the position he wants me to play. I'm interested in setting in which he coached me for a while before making me a subset again which I have most experience in but he's introducing me to spiking for a while now which is new to me. I hate it when I can't professionalize in one area and be average in everything instead. Sometimes I really envy the team when they have their own positions to play and they're so damn good in it considering they have been training for so long. But what am I srsly. I wanna be good in something too.

Have been excited over jersey and such but come to think of it. I don't even know if I can make it into the team. I have a feeling I'll be one of the 2 to be out, although I really don't want to. Seriously, I've been trying to do well in whatever positions he wants me to play and when I make mistakes or fail to do something right on court I suddenly feel like there's a 100kg on my shoulders, and then my standard of playing will drop a little. I don't know, I'm losing confidence and I hate it. I learnt to attend training in a good mood so I'll perform better, smile and laugh more whether I'm tired or not, whether I like it or not, but then again after I'm home I start to think if the fact that I tried so hard would pay off. Of course, if I don't make it in then it's my fault for not being good enough. But I really tried my best this holiday, to play well every trng and put up a decent performance at least.

I've never tried so hard for something, not even in my studies. But it isn't working from the way I'm seeing it. I don't have much time left for improvement 'cos the season's starting in January. I don't even know if now's the time for me to try harder or to just learn to let go and wait till the season ends and prepare for next.

The weather's still great but I lost the mood for writing Chinese characters.

This.

2010-12-11T22:40:00.006+08:00

I wanna love you, I can't live without you.
I don't wanna hurt you, I really need you.

My.hair.

2010-12-11T22:02:00.003+08:00

Hi all I took up the courage to upload a pic of my new hair say hi.

Did self rebonding yesterday and after the last time I had to blow my hair, it was alr 1.00am. And turned out that my hair ain't that straight after all. Mom claims it's better to do @ home 'cos she's trying to defend herself but no way. Salons are way better. So is the cutting of hair. multiplied by 100. The fringe looks like a square on the top right hand corner of my face. Anyway, this is Mom's work and she's proud of it.

This week of training has had its ups and downs. Wednesday was okay, for me. Didn't really defend much since no balls came to me but ended up playing setter since Cherie was overseas and oh it was so fun !! Training to be a setter may be tough, but playing the position sure is a hell lot of fun, ~~if it isn't your professional position.~~ Friday's training played subset more than setter but my setting was not too bad and my defending was just horrible. Don't know why but I can't communicate during the game without Leng Yen so please come back soon Leng Yen Leng Yen !

Went for tuition today and didn't pay attention in class. She spent about half an hour to 45 minutes telling me about how the school's way of writing 报章报道 is so '死板' and kept telling me there's no need for this and that. Well, just go die. My schools teaches me that way and you're asking me to go against it. I know it's a dumb method but I don't have a damn choice so stop nagging at me. After that got impatient and didn't wna listen so I just shut up for the rest of tuition. In the end my compre qns were answered horribly and she said my Chinese is deteriorating 'cos I don't go for tuition often. Well, shit you. Srsly. I go for tuition every week and even if I don't I go for replacements. You gave me a month of break and now you're saying this.

Holiday homework completion doesn't look too good. Haven't really finished everything but I'm gna finish my Chinese letter writing and 报章报道 tonight I guess.

Cedar is like that. Volleyball is like that. Our life's like that. So c'mon pull yourself together keep holding and stay strong alright. We're a team so we're all there for one another. Sometimes, the harder you fall, the higher you bounce back up. This isn't the time to fall its time to pull yourself pack tgt and prove yourself.

Smile, and tmr will be a better day.

Sunny Sunday

2010-12-06T23:14:00.003+08:00

My Sunday was well spent, and today's friendly was pretty fun. The week's gna be great and I know it ! :B

Sunday met Dad in the afternoon and went to Changi Village for lunch. Met cousins after that and headed to SAF since they had a room there for the weekend. Ah it's my first time there and it's rly pretty (: Ate and then went to walk around the place.

After playing with the fishes in the pond for while Dad, knowing that there's a fish with teeth, agitated it and in the end he got bitten.

Pretty badly.

Hah. So went back up to watch some tv before going to walk around and play at the arcade. It's been long since I've played with arcade machines and it feels weird I can't play anymore 'cos no games interest me any longer :x

After awile at sunset went for ice cream before playing pool. Long time since I played I've become a bit rusty but it was fun, especially after watching that weird pool show. Went back up and then a bit of tv again before going to East Coast for dinner. Looking for seats + waiting in line for beef noodles took up an hour. Can.you.imagine.

That was all for Sunday. Today woke up late for the first time this year to the extend that I had to take cab T^T Waste my money ): Had to reach school by 8am but I woke up at 7.15am so in the end I rushed my shower, drank milk straight from the carton, tied my hair on the cab and ate dry cornflakes. On call cab now have a damn expensive booking fee of 3.50$. Plus it was peak hour this morning so altogether my cab fare was 16.20$ when it would be around 9$ for the distance itself only. In the end reached there early. I mean, if I took bus I would be late so..

Yu Hua came again for friendly. Played a number of matches, think 3 ? And yay played spiker again. It was pretty fun ! Didn't spike in the net and spiked only one ball out so I'm happy I pretty much..improved. (?) Have been doing yoga at home to strengthen lower body muscles and make my thighs slimmer. I'm getting muscle aches, that's good ! Heartpain after the cab fare so just went home to eat cup noodles :x

That's all, Mdm. Tan again tmr since she can't make it this Saturday. Pretty sianded but if it means I can sleep it on Saturday then I don't mind. ^^

Homework

2010-12-04T22:48:00.002+08:00

I've started on homework and I'm not used to it.

Bought books already despite my bookshelf not packed yet :x So anyway tried to wrap some of my books and the outside looked good but the inside was..a different story hehe. Started on holiday homework today and its the first time I'm doing Chinese first instead of English so it feels weird. I haven't started writing English yet and I need to practice my penmanship for Chinese, like learning how to write my name all over again. After one month of not touching work my brain is malfunctioning. It's rusty and I cannot think well so it takes me a whole day to write 4 paragraphs for 报章报道. Sigh. Both compositions are due by Tuesday. Tell me how.

Looking on the brighter side, CHALET TMR YAY ! Looks like next week's gna be busy. Trainings on Monday, Wednesday and Friday but jiaolian says he'll try to arrange friendlies. Tuition on Tuesday and maybe a friendly with PLMGS that day too so I hope they don't clash else I can't go. I rly want to ): Thursday will be carnival which I'm looking forward to ^^ Looks like its a whole week of friendlies. YAY !

On the other hand, jiaolian has been talking about how our team don't seem to be so united and loud anymore during trainings after our trip to Aust ): Well, glad that after the talk we decided to be more open and match last training turned out to be fun ! Currently jiaolian said that he confirmed 9 people in main, which leaves only 3 spaces with 5 people fighting. I somehow get the feeling that I would be out of main 12 next year. But I rly hope not. Gna bring ball to the petrol kiosk tmr to pump so I can self train during the weekends and on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Get my receiving angle and stance right before school starts next year and its gna be busy.

That's about all :\ Currently watching Stage Of Youth !

Hehehehehehehehhe Hangeng.

Happy 3rd

2010-12-02T23:20:00.002+08:00

I'm happy I'm grateful and I thank you,

♥

Pig

2010-11-30T15:39:00.005+08:00

Haven't been blogging 'cos I've been pigging on awesome food hehehe !

Supermarket has new food now and that includes dukbokki ! It's really good but hella spicy. Mom's also addicted to it teehee ! There's also kimbab but it doesn't look as good and reliable so, heh.

Anyway Sunday was Grandma's dinner @ International Seafood and it was quite okay (: Pictures of the food xD but I missed out some dishes.

The original serving for the prawns was like that but I can't peel prawns so I got a little help and,
it became like that :B

Ohoh and this is my first glass of alchohol in my 14 years of living. I usually get sips but this white wine was mine which I had trouble finishing. Man, I can't drink.

Came home late around 11pm+ and so by the time I showered and packed for trng as well as tie the shoelace for my court shoes it was already midnight and I had to wake up at 6.15am for trng ): Ohwell, speaking of court shoes, I want new courtshoes so badly ! The insides of my shoes are becoming so 'kiam chye'. Had training and everyone was quite sian anyway. Played spiker and subset but lost my temper pretty quickly on cdiv side :x Had lunch tgt at Macs before busing home.

Came home showered and youtubed till 5.00pm and wanted to take a nap but it turned out that I didn't wake up despite Mom's attempts to wake me up and I slept till 9.45pm at night. Lazy to get dinner so I continued sleeping until about 10.50am before waking up :x Now I'm very awake I'm not sure if I can sleep well enough for tmr's training but I feel pretty lethargic.

Intended to pack bookshelf by today after watching certain stuffs but it turned out that related videos were entertaining too so it turns out that my bookshelf is still unpacked. Guess I'll try to clear at least one section by tonight so I can buy books by this Friday :x Anywho. Friendly tmr with River Valley. Really do hope I can play well !

Rice !

2010-11-24T22:25:00.004+08:00

After coming back from Australia for a week alr, I FINALLY GOT TO EAT RICE ! Haha omg I'm so happy I think I found my taste buds again after surviving on microwave foods, cup noodles and spaghetti ^^

Reached school at 0827 ! I was on time but the rest were early so there were like alr changed and getting ready to run by the time I was there. Shot. Anywho, Chung Cheng Main came to play friendly today and I played spiker for one set like whoohoooo ! I guess I kinda overcame my fear of spiking. I just have to whack the ball over and make sure it goes down and its in, teehee ! During spiking jiaolian told me to just run in at one shot before spiking and not pause before I jump to ensure maximum power but I can't get use to the timing so I guess I'll have to work on it all over again. Played subset for the rest of the sets with the sec 2s and it was rly fun ^^

After awile seniors came and finally I get to play @ bdiv side even if it means subset hehe ^^ I think I did well today. Going for training in a good mood makes me play better (: It's 2242 now and there's nothing to do except start on homework or clear my bookshelf. Guess I shall start English now. Gna clear bookshelf tmr since the part time maid's coming and this weekend I'll get my ball pumped so I can start practicing spiking, yay ! Ohya, U16 semis is tmr and I don't know if I should watch, or skip open hse on Saturday to watch the finals instead.

On the other hand, I have been into SJ for a few days now and I'm totally addicted to She's Gone its on repeat on my dock now :B

So I say a little prayer

2010-11-23T17:01:00.002+08:00

An hour ago the weather was so hot my kuku mother wore sunglasses in the hse, now its thundering like crazy. But no rain is falling.

Wanted to pack my bookshelf today but my phone hanged for the whole damn day which ruined my mood. Followed by the folding of massive amounts of laundry. So nevermind, I'll settle it..during the weekends. Meanwhile, I have yet to start on holiday homework. I shall start when I've bought the new books !

Anywho. Yesterday's training didn't go on so well. Warm up running was okay. Sleeping early helps to minimise early muscle fatigue ! Then after awile of setting neck started to ache alot and when we were done and jiaolian was explaining about service I swear my neck felt like it was going to break I couldn't keep it straight and then I couldn't listen to or see jiaolian and before I knew it Maureen was bringing me to the side to sit. Coach dragged me outside to sit and so I wasn't allowed to service during warm up :\ Receiving for tipping ball practice and abit of spiking before I played libero at cdiv side till the end of training. Plan to play well failed, damn. Hardly go for training in a good mood so I wanted to play more but, ohwell.

Dear Lord Jesus, please help me to get enough rest tonight so I will be able to have training tmr with no problems. Dear Lord, please help me to be able to play well for training tmr. Be it setting, receiving or spiking, please help me to put up a decent performance and help me to react fast and estimate well. I commit my performance for tmr's training into your hands. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen.

My teenage dream

2010-11-20T22:04:00.003+08:00

Is you.

Officially lost 1kg and I can wear my old clothes again ! So gladly picked the white top to wear and Mom was surprised I could wear it again haha awesome ^^

Got home from steamboat awile ago but got distracted while thinking of a blog post title and went on youtube instead teeheh. Anyway, finally cleared my study table of useless things and cleaned all the gross dust away. Now it's all neat and I know where my stuff is, yay (:

Stuck the Alice Nine poster from my first Neo Genesis issue from Australia up the wall too ! It's cheaper there though hehe ! Left with bookshelves and wardrobe to clear and pack which I hope I can finish doing by November so I can start my revision and studies for next year in a proper environment (: My bookshelf is getting so messy and packed the more I look at it the more I don't feel like packing it but.. The sooner I get it done the more time I have to find my damn thumbdrive so I can go develop Aussie photos ^^

Going out tmr ! Don't know what we're gna do. There's no nice movie showing in cinema now, I'm sick and had enough of shopping, there's srsly nothing to do than..eat. After losing weight I'm snacking non-stop on the chocolates I bought from Aust.

Argh srsly, control !

Distress and Coma

2010-11-19T21:38:00.006+08:00

Out for the whole day today but I had fun and I liked it. Mom obviously doesn't. Her hooha-ing isn't a nice way to conclude the day but, wtv. A husband can choose his wife but a child can't choose her parents.

Met @ Potong Pasir earlier than arranged before to have breakfast with the rest of the sec 2s before going back to school so that Sihui can buy her books before training. Then went to sports hall but shutters were down and it was locked so ended up calling Mr Lee to unlock it but the process was pretty funny haha !

Went for training and ttly missed the Neo Shock flooring. Anyway jiaolian didn't bother welcoming us that much. Just "okay, 欢迎你们回来" and then went on about what he saw from other teams for U16, how we should adjust back to training mode 'cos he feels we played too much and how he felt we don't have much time left. Learnt how to spike short balls today but let's just say spiking isn't my thing and ended up getting scolded quite alot. So wtv. He isn't gna tell me what position he wants me to play so I don't know what to do and how to improve and I'm sorry.

Set for warm up > did spiking for training > played subset for all the sets during game. What sense does this make ? VJ plus sec 4s came to train so ttly no chance to play at b'div side. I have this feeling I'm not gna make it next year. Why the hell must I set for warm up when he's not training me to be a setter. So I can help warm up his setter ? Why am I spiking during training when I end up in the back row defending during games ? I don't even get trained for my position- Oh I forgot, I don't have one. Make me train all 3 and expect me to know all 3 and then not play at b'div side.

After training went for tauhuay with team after Mom agreed on the phone call I had with her. Walking time + eating time there was within an hour and left to bus stop with Mel. I practically smsed Mom everywhere I go. When I leave school, when I leave the shop, when I'm on the bus and she replies 'Ok'. And then when I come home she starts yelling @ me why I'm out for the whole day and how I'm busier than her. Of course I'm busier than you 'cos you don't lift your damn butt out of the chair and work but, of all things, play Bejeweled on your computer for the whole damn day. I didn't do any fcking thing wrong. I let you know when I left home, my whereabouts, bought dinner back for you and instead of thanking me you yelled. WELL, YEAH. THANKS. Srsly, I can't live in this home anymore.

No other

2010-11-17T23:10:00.005+08:00

Firstly to start off the post,

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JULIA !!

Don't know if you received Mel and my sms on 11/11/10 MIDNIGHT (cool eh) before we went on the plane, but I got you your present alr !

You't been such a great and lively friend, there's no better friend I could ask for. Although its a pity I still don't really know you well or talk to you much after 2 years of knowing each other and taking bus to and from school, I srsly do hope that our friendship will continue even though we'll be in separate classes ! Thank you for bearing with all the awkward bus trips together with me, thank you for tolerating my fangirlism be it kpop or jrock, thank you for waking up late so we can take cab instead of bus TEEHEE :x All in all you're an awesome friend and I wish you all the best !! Tkcare !

Anyway, I'm back from Australia !! Such a pretty and wonderful place. Guess this trip has been my most memorable one in my 14 years of living, no seriously. Alright, I'm pretty lazy to elaborate my six days there but all in all, the trip couldn't have been better and I have absolutely no regrets of choosing to go (Y)

AIS was great. The campus, the dorm, the food, the courts. Flight to Sydney was so uncomfortable and tiring, followed by the extraordinary long bus trip. In the end we were off schedule and missed out lectures. So we ended up having our tour there and playing frisbee at night before sleeping. Playing with the team at night in such an awesome weather in a foreign country is darn cool ! (Y)

Totally miss the food there. Often crashed into people's dorm to talk till late in the night before going to bed and it's really interesting to have such honest talks. Had team talks about training too and played arcade games, table tennis, spammed hot chocolate, played in such an awesome court which allows one to slide so damn far. AIS is just cool.

Sightseeing was great too. Went to DFO the factory outlet to shop on the last day but I didn't spend much although there were so many things I wanted to buy 'cos I thought Sydney would have alot more. Guess I was partially wrong, but its alright ! Haha. Canberra's rly beautiful.

Took a bus to Sydney. More sightseeing, more shopping, more team bonding, more fun.

For some odd reason, we actually chose to go to Sydney Fish Market when we were in Singapore but the actual place is seriously..stinky. At least the scenery was good ^^
Then headed to The Rocks and man, the bridge, the view of Sydney Opera House, Hyatt hotel was all too great. Lots of pictures in don't know who's camera but its all going up on facebook anyway.

Weather was okay at first but it started to rain so we spent the rest of the day shopping and I seriously felt so sick of shopping for the first time in my life. My legs are so tired, running out of cash, explosive prices. But it was a good experience nonetheless ! (:

The view of Darling Harbour at the Harbourside was pretty but my camera's resolution wasn't good enough so.. :\

First time staying in dorms this Australia trip and it's rly interesting ! All bunk beds. And its like small and cosy and such and totally plain. Thats the life of students and backpackers there I guess. Waking up in the morning and snatching those shared toilets was kinda irritating but fun haha ! Australia has been great but my write up was horrible so nevermind. Thankyou grandpa and grandma for paying for my Aussie trip, I HAD SO MUCH FUN.

I'm suffering from Australia withdrawal sickness. But look on the bright side, TRAINING ON FRIDAY ! ^^

Tonight

2010-11-10T15:44:00.002+08:00

WHOOHOO its finally here ! Flight to Aussie is tonight /happy dances.

Finally officially done packing luggage and handcarry ! It's close to full and I doubt I can have space for shopping. Ohwell. Charged my phone this morning and it has to last me till the end of tmr. Figured that it sounded dangerous so yanked out my iPod and hell yeah its still working and the data is intact \m/

Looking forward to the trip ! Clinic appointment at 5pm, before going to change money and we have to meet @ 9.30pm. BYE SINGAPORE, HELLO KANGAROOS !

Yknow this feeling when somewhere inside your ears has a sharp pain for a split second ?

It's simple like that

2010-11-09T15:22:00.004+08:00

Have to finish packing cos we're off to Aussie tmr !! Excited excited !

Left with house tees, jerseys, sleepwear, toiletries and shoebag and I'm done. Wheehoo ! Had been going with my dieting plan, feeding on sandwiches and fruits and nothing else since Saturday. But since I went out on Sunday with Dad, it means outside food :x Managed to get stuff from FOX and an ugly track pants. There were no cuttings which were more fitting, so to say. So no choice, and that pants makes my hip look bigger than usual x10.

Anyway training yesterday was pretty okay, since VJ came, so played cdiv side again. Warmed up setter, trained spiking, then played one set of setter, 2 sets of subset and 1 set of spiker. Like what is this. Felt so lethargic yesterday and unwilling to move. So wasn't in the mood for anything, ohwell :\ Bused home, delivered present to Ju's hse, buy takeaway food, walk home, and Mommy asked why am I so dirty today. Hello, I had training and had to walk so far just to buy food you wanted to eat. Mom is being annoying recently, pushing appointments to last minute and getting so easily irritated, having me to settle our meals. And since last week don't know which idiot living upstairs have been doing renovations starting 9am every fcking day. Hammer, drill, hammer, drill. Get the fck out of here.

Supposed to go out today to buy travel necessities but she's sleeping. SRSLYYYYYYY. Doing things last minute v fun meh. You like thrill ? I don't.

Edit:

back from Parkway. Did some last minute shopping and run some errands before going for dinner @ Subway. Its been awile so I'm happy ^^ More plums to snack on tonight, I'm getting rly addicted. It's good ! (Y)

I got my ugly nose from my grandma, rly.

2010-11-04T17:15:00.002+08:00

I'm just saying.

Anyway, this is the second(?) week of holidays and I have not touched holiday homework, packed my luggage for Aust trip, or clean up my room. I'm doomed. But ohwell, trng @ HGP went on quite well, though didn't get many chances to spike, I think my defending was quite well done. Hopefully I can keep up like that ^^ No training tmr ! Training resumes on Monday and there still is one on Wednesday before we meet @ airport at night for departure.

Don't know why but Mom doesn't seem to mind me going to straighten my hair again, BUT has issues bringing me to the salon. Tsk. There's no training tmr, how perfect would it be to straighten it during the weekends before Aussie trip. Dr Ng is doing a surgery tday so can't go for IPL either and pushed back to Tuesday. I'm down on my luck boohoo.

Today has been passing quickly. Woke up at 1pm, had lunched, unknowingly watched videos and slacked around for 3 hours before showering and here I am settling my downloads. Its taking a long time, don't know why :\ Ohwell, till then !

fail

2010-10-31T21:57:00.002+08:00

Plan to get materials for doing those "Goodbye, I will miss you" cards was total fail.

Woke up before my alarm rang and then took my time to get ready and meet Dad @ 12pm. Then afterwards picked up grandparents from church and went to eat steamboat. Since grandparents were with us so I couldn't go shopping for materials :\ SO, ended up playing badminton at KA. After that pretty much stayed at Dad's and camped on youtube tgt with cousin before leaving for dinner.

Funny how cousin and I have similar hair problems. Be it laser-ing or re-bonding haha ! Glad to know we get along fine ^^ Grandma's birthday celebration's on the 26th and I have no idea what to do for her :\ Anyway, have to get up at 9.45am tmr just so that I can send the streaming option form to school before 12pm and then head for trng at HGP by 1.30pm all the way till 6pm. Tmr's gna be a long day !

To think it over

2010-10-29T23:38:00.005+08:00

Haven't been updating, but last day of school was yesterday.

Anyway tday in short, friendly @ Sembawang was okay, long bus rides, lunch with mates, home.

Time really flies past quickly (I say this every year), but this year seems to have gone past faster than last year. This year was pretty interesting and happening, I experienced ultimate happiness, sadness, disappointment, frustration, got my heart broken, realised new interests and lost some. Overall too many things has happened I think I need time to digest. Supposedly I have a lot on my mind to blog about when I space out, but now I don't know what to type.

Last day of school but I didn't rly feel sad like what people from other classes felt. Wasn't extremely happy either. Just this weird feeling like everything's normal and life's just gna keep going. Perhaps it was 'cos I didn't feel too attached to anyone in class, even clique, 'cos I feel myself drifting further away from them towards the end of the year. Next year we'll be in new classes seeing new faces having new teachers, guess I'll have to be more sociable by then.

Turn on the TV: Oh look, its this show. Oh right, there's Shin Sekyung.

Turn off the TV.

Maybe I'm overreacting, maybe I'm just being immature, or childish, or wtv. But I can't change the way I feel because of the comments you guys give me. I don't know what are your opinions on me feeling this way but I honestly don't think there's a need to feed me with harsh comments. Yes, its unrealistic, okay wtv, but isn't it normal to feel at least a little heartbroken. Perhaps I'm too sensitive or obsessive. So share your opinions amongst yourselves 'cos I don't want to hear it.

Meanwhile, to get things off my mind now, the GazettE's music seems to be pretty suitable to drown in.

Went to tokyohive to catch up with their news again and there's a new single to be released on December. Ruki and Kai still looks dashing (at least with make up on) and I'm so happy for them they'll be performing @ Tokyo Dome. Ganbette ~

HAPPY ONE DAY BELATED BIRTHDAY KAI ! ♥

When the clock strikes 11:11, I have nothing to wish for any longer.

Tired

2010-10-25T21:38:00.002+08:00

I'm tired, and my knee's starting to hurt after a long time. Man this sucks.

I'm mentally and physically tired. But school hours today was alright. At first had tchoukball and it was really fun !! Enjoyed it alot and good news we're playing it on Wednesday again ^^ After that had movie screening, but we didn't finish the whole thing :\ Anyway dismissed at 12.45pm, had training. Warm up was different from usual. Then set basketball after a long time and warm up setting was so fcking hard cos of tape. Decided to take it off after that but didn't play Bdiv side at all tday :\ All at cdiv side. Ohwell, I kinda gave up hope. Where is the keen attitude and motivation I had in Sec one ? Man I need it now :\

Came home my legs are so tired adding on had badminton yesterday. Tmr there's ultimate frisbee too T^T Dont have a clue on how to play it cos I can't throw a frisbee. Wednesday is training yet again after volleyball. 4 days in a row of sports I feel like my knee is gna give way.

Talking about something else, I rly wna do something about my hair, all kinds of hair I have cos I have never been in such a messy state before and I hate it. Okay this sounds (slightly) funny. I need a hair cut and straightening, waxing and IPL. Won't that cost alot ._. Okay so just my head hair is all I'm asking for. Before Aust trip.

I can fly

2010-10-23T00:35:00.002+08:00

Made it through results day today without tears, I seriously feel so relieved now I feel like I can fly.

Not like I did really well either anyway, but I guess I should be satisfied with my results. After adding up together with CA:

Math - A2

Geography - A2

History - A2

Science - B3

Literature - B3

English - B3

HMT - B4

I'm just really happy I actually passed HMT, meaning to say I can continue taking it next year. Was expecting to fail for that, and Cs for Math and Science, SO GREAT ! On the other hand I was super confident and wanted a A1 for Literature so badly, in the end I had like a C5 ._. Thank God for my A1s for CA. Now that results are released, all that remains is the filling in of streaming option form which I'm kind of still worrying about making the wrong choice.

Today's training was okay. Physical, if compared to previous trainings, was not tough at all. Yipee. Most of bdiv didn't come so ended up playing with cdiv. Overall I think my setting today was much more screwed than last training so I really regret. Since I had been the only setter attending on Wednesday and today, I should be showing potential and putting in my best. Not screwing it up with some shit play and pissing my seniors off. It just wasn't my best, and here I am cursing myself wondering why didn't I just put it a bit more effort to get the ball set to the place right.

Ohwell, the weekends are here. Gotta book a court for badminton for Daddy day on Sunday. Other than that I guess that's all.

Clicks better without me.

Suan

2010-10-20T20:40:00.002+08:00

Training is just becoming more and more tiring. Nope I'm not aging.

Past few days have been spent wasting time in school and playing Sims. Training started too and physical returns for a start. Lost my jumping power, lost my stamina, all gone. Training today was rather empty and short, many didn't come and we had 6 people just nice to form a team on one side. VJ came for awile so trained with them before playing with juniors. No setters today 'cos Maureen left early so I did setting. Tired shitz. Got scolded today 'cos of my indifferent attitude as claimed during training with VJ and coach said my setting wasn't good today, but I personally thought I didnt do too bad, ohwell.

Other than that there was NE carnival before training and it was boring. Tmr is promotion day so its a holiday, yay for that then. Shiri said laoshi said our class rank 3rd for Chinese and all of us passed, double yay, really really really really yay.

Thank you

2010-10-17T22:04:00.003+08:00

The most simple words, yet the most meaningful.

Haven't been blogging much despite the fact that post exam activities are going on now. Guess I have nothing to blog about. Friday's sculpture work was boring and tiring. Vball carnival after that was fun though ! Got paired with Gwyneth and we had fun singing and such while playing and failing to hit balls over haha ! Mom came to send me home aft that and yay, thats a good start for the weekends. Basically spent the rest of that night plus Saturday on Sims again. I'm addicted.

Tday went out for lunch with Dad and co. At the same time discovered that Grandpa and Grandma actually contributed 1000 bucks each to my Aust trip. Grandparents are the best, thank you ! Spend the rest of the day playing sims again before dinner and home. Bought candy ^^ Training starts tmr and I hope I'll be able to catch up quickly and get my ball sense back soon. Oh and I need to build up on stamina and estimation skills again.

For now I'm thinking about alot of things I don't know how to blog about :\
I've been having headaches often, don't know why.
I hate life in Cedar.
I feel so insignificant.
I don't have friends, call me a loner.
I dont know if I should perm or rebond my hair.
I need to wax and do IPL soon.
I'm not sure if I'll do well and I'm afraid.
I don't know which stream to choose.
I'm just fucking scared I wna cry.

End of Years ENDED

2010-10-14T21:11:00.004+08:00

EOYs are OVER, FINALLY OVER.
Not like I think I'll do well, but all that matters is that I don't have to study throughout the night anymore fyeah.

So far for EOYs, I think I screwed up pretty much of it. Careless mistakes, stuff that I have forgotten. But I have confidence for English comprehension and summary, Geography, Literature, Math Paper 1, Science section A. Sounds pretty pathetic,'cos these are the parts containing the least marks. But heck, shan't talk about it till I reviewed my papers.

After Math paper tday, waited for Sinyee before going off to Pasta Mania @ Parkway for lunch, then Ice Cream Chef. Just the usual, we don't have much to talk about outside work. Went bird watching for abit haha. Walked home with Ju from there and spend the rest of the day on Sims woohoo finally ^^ Sculpture walk tmr, and vb carnival after that. Gna be tiring, but hey VB CARNIVAL YO.

Tomorrow

2010-10-10T21:59:00.002+08:00

Starting tmr, 4 days straight of examination papers which would determine my stream for next year, tsk.

Finished up science notes today and chionged 4 or 5 chapters of Geog notes at one shot successfully. My most productive day ever. I think I mastered agriculture. Land supply I guess soso. I still don't understand how empoldering and drainage of swamps is done such that it magically results in more available land. Abit scared for map reading though, Ohwell, I'll do my best tmr, gdluck to all !

Dear Lord Jesus, tmr is the start of the important EOY papers for streaming and I sincerely pray that you would guide me through them. Please help to recall whatever I have learnt and correctly apply them to my exam questions. I really wna do well to make up for my language papers which I'm not confident of. So Lord I pray that you'll help me to practice good time management and be able to keep calm and finish the papers on time with your guidance. I commit my remaining papers into your hands dear Lord. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

'll be back on Thursday suckas !

1 more day

2010-10-09T21:30:00.003+08:00

Tmr's Sunday, meaning 1 more day till the start of EOY paper marathon. I'm excited I'm excited I'm excited, but I'm not done studying.

Short update, I don't even find purpose in blogging anymore.

For some reason I don't feel so stressed this time. I think exams are gna be...fun ? :x Left with 3 chapters of Science, 2 and a half chapters of Hist. Starting Literature only the day before so I can remember quotes :\ Anyway looking on the brighter side, I finally stepped into a mall after don't know how many weeks or months I don't know I don't wna know. Went to do some shopping with Mom for exam materials etc.

Sinyee came over yesterday to study after school. Didn't slack much, finished transport in living things ! I have about half of Electricity left and I'll reward myself with wgm before moving off to another chapter ^^

Countdown: 6 more days

2010-10-05T17:38:00.002+08:00

6 more days till EOYs will come and go quickly, I'm dreading it. But nevertheless part of is still excited.

Anyway have not been blogging late due to studies. I've been pretty productive studying every day. Done with 3 chapters of Science, everything of Geography and 1 and a half chapters of History since Friday. Anyway had tuition after school today and successfully cleared doubts and corrections for all the practice papers done in school. One more Victoria paper to go and Mark also printed 2 other school paper for me to finish by Wednesday. Sigh, computer time = minimise more.

Ohwell, tmr's gonna be a short day and I'll attempt to cover more chapters then. For today I'm so distracted. Guess it's okay, finished studying a chapter of Science in school alr anyway.

Tkcare bb !

Hello, hello

2010-10-01T20:30:00.002+08:00

SHINee is back !! How untimely for them to start promotions, when I have to revise for EOYs. Pfft.

Today is Friday, better still, there isn't Chinese tuition anymore until December YAHOO. I can finally sleep in on Saturdays (Y). School was so, unlike school today. Math was the only proper lesson, well actually not exactly, since we were doing Math papers ._. Next was D&T, finished up and had more than a period to do Math. Jogging, then Ms Chen came in for History format revision in which I fell asleep during the last 5 minutes. Followed by free period since its the first time in history TBC isn't here. Then assembly.

Mom came to pick me up. And since she alr ate I made her drive me to tauhuay to buy takeaway. Hah, am I awesome or what. My cravings for tauhuay has been rly..strong ? Hah, came home, studied part of Geog, then took a nap till 4.50pm and studied in front of the tv while waiting for SHINee to come on Mubank. HEE. For agriculture I'm half done, I shall finish studying by tonight ! ^^

Mom, for the last time, they're not shining.

Hello, hello

Please give me a chance.

Hello, hello

I don't know how you feel right now.

Who knows ? Two of us,

Might be destiny.

I'm left with an imperfect smile

2010-09-29T21:46:00.003+08:00

Countdown to start of main subjects EOY: Twelve12
HMT EOY Paper 1 was great I think, hopefully I'll score. Paper 2 just sucked so much I don't even wna tall abt it. I'll be happy if I just passed.

I've been rather productive today. Went to school and managed to complete tuition work in the assessment book today during last 2 free periods. Got back Math mocks paper 1 too, failed as expected, by 4 marks. Paper 2 will be tmr and I'm just hoping that I will be able to do well enough to make up for how badly I did for paper 1. Literature was just, useless. Mrs Sri made use of the 50 minutes of lessons to copy study guide qns, dumb much ? History was the same, nothing important was taught and Science was okay. Mr Chai, please get your retina back or sth and revise with us soon.

Went for 1 hour maintenance training aft school. Played ball, did a few hurdle jumps, and did the spiking specific test again and I didn't improve, still stuck at 148cm :\ Had briefing on Australia trip too, and Mr Lee said prices might be going up by 300$ or more cos of peak period. I don't even know how much I have in my edusave. All in all, I'm dead. Discussed bunking arrangements. No, didn't discuss, I just followed what I was given. I think speaking my mind would just be inappropriate. What if I said no ? You didn't even care.

I have so much to study I don't know where to even START. Goodness. Oh Lord please gimme the discipline.

Languages

2010-09-27T17:44:00.002+08:00

One paper down, another six more to go.

I've been blogging more and more often because doing nothing but studying (and occasionally peeping on youtube) has driven me nuts. Firstly, English paper was today and I think I could have done a lot better if I hadn't underestimate the time left. Tsk, damn irritating to the max. Paper one wrote situational writing first. They said 250-350 words but fck the information they gave forced us to write 10 times more. Took quite some time for situational writing, about more than 45 minutes. So I, being as paranoid as always, thought that I didn't have enough time for compo. Plus, the compo questions are crazily difficult. In the end chiong-ed and didn't bother to write neatly like I always do during exams. Finished it in half an hour ._. Which leaves me another half an hour. Started thinking if I should redo, but instead kept checking the scripts till 15 minutes was left and obviously its not enough time to redo. Overall, I regretted managing my time so lousily and writing so half-heartedly. Ugh. I could have done alot better, really ):

Paper 2 was ~~a lot~~ better ? Had plenty of time to do it, I figured. So while everyone quickly flipped the paper to read the questions I slowly read the passage the second time HEHE. Anyway, made like FULL use of the given time and finished checking 5 minutes before end time. I think I will do well for Paper 2, hopefully it'll pull up my marks for overall.

After school, off for Chinese tuition. Didn't do much but it took up 3 hours ._. Met Grandma on the bus home, but I just studied and didn't entertain. Ah, I bet she dislikes granddaughters more now. Ohwell, I don't rly care for now. Off to revise Chinese !

GDLUCK ALL !

Interaction

2010-09-26T12:10:00.002+08:00

Today is Sunday, means tmr's Monday, means tmr's English paper, means brother is flying off again.

I'm so nervous for EOYs. Super nervous. I haven't exactly done well in English this year. Help. So anyway I wasted the whole of yesterday on tuition and gatherings. Went for Mdm. Tan tuition and she had guests halfway so she went out to entertain them and let me off late _l_ Like wth I don't care if you have guests, I came on time and you let me off an hour late. Then rushed to buy lunch and back home, shower, change, prepare gift for ahgong.

After that went to study, before going to Mt. Faber SAFRA to celebrate ahgong's 80th dinner woohooooo. All the..elder cousins sat at one table. But I was the youngest there, and it felt so awkward. No interaction, how sad is that dinner. Everyone looked so dao and, I don't know. Forget it. After taking family photo, Dad's always the first one to ask us to leave. Nevermind, the atmosphere wasn't too good anyway.

Off to revise for English.

De-stress

2010-09-24T19:43:00.002+08:00

Today is pretty good, not only because of Friday, but many other reasons that defines bliss.

School today was pretty boring though, unfortunately. The corner I'm sitting in makes me concentrate in class more often 'cos there's no one to rly entertain me, so overall I'm pretty quiet, feels weird, but its fine. Ms. Chen came in for History and the people at my corner cracked up at her damn disturbing voice hehe.

Anyway ladilada, aft school Mel and I went up to sports hall with the sole intention of playing ball, but ended up doing some physical stuff too with Guting. Sec ones left and we played 2 V 2 with Mr Lee. It was fun woohooooooo ! After that tau huay-ed tgt as well. Was being all gluttony but I still didn't feel full after that :\ Vanessa came after awile to join us all drenched, srsly drenched. Haha cool ttm :x Left for home aft that and slacked abit, and here I am going through Chinese.

The whole of my tomorrow will be dedicated to tuition and family gatherings so means a day of studying is gone. Guess I'll have to stay up tonight.

Hit the books

2010-09-22T21:37:00.002+08:00

I got my nerd self back and I'm into the study mood but my bedtime curfew forbids me to continue. I know I have so many more things to go through for Math for the mocks tmr, I don't even know if I should be studying under the blanket.

Firstly today school was pretty okay. Didn't feel tired or anything I was attentive throughout. Lessons seem to interest me more now that I've started counting down to my exam papers. Aft school went to NEWater and our tour guide Ronnie was rly entertaining, the best one I've yet to have so overall the trip was fun. Bused home with Julia we were both supposed to study but I fell asleep halfway studying Geog, sigh. Got caught in the rain walking back, showered, did Math Math Math throughout until now that is bedtime. Filed all my worksheets and started revising. Goodness I had so much to revise. Guess I'll just be grabbing a sandwich for recess and staying in class to do Math. I so have to do well for Math mocks, I need to score at least 72.

On the other hand revision for other subjects hasn't been going on well. I need TTF to come back and teach us, Chai to give me private tutoring and Teow to come back and teach us till we're done with EOYs. Read a chapter of science otw to school and a chapter of Geog otw home from school. Tmr will be reserved for Math :\ I just srsly wna have 10 hours straight to lock myself in a room and study. EOYs are srsly..just nearing too fast.

Studies aside, I'm blogging more often now though no one actually reads this. I guess I just need a platform to talk to. Brother is maybe coming home tmr, Mom has yet to call him :\ Saturday is grandpa's big birthday and I don't know what to do to look good. School is becoming more and more mundane I don't even bother trying to be entertaining anymore. It's so disturbing,I feel so insignificant, you just keep pissing me off and you keep making me feel so damn annoyed sometimes.

Get me outta this hellhole.

Studies

2010-09-21T20:22:00.002+08:00

My studies should be priority now,

and not camping on youtube and facebook and livejournal.

But apparently thats not what my top sites tell me, ah fck it, where is the motivation I need.

I remembered how last year in Secondary 1, I transformed into a complete nerd studying and studying and completing high quality work starting from the month of September. 9 more days till the end of September and I'm still not hardworking. Where has my motivation gone too. Why don't I seem to even bother about my studies anymore. Stress has apparently become my favourite word to use but it isn't really an excuse. Studying just turns me off and I'm so fcked up 'cos this is my damn streaming year. In fact I haven't started studying a single chapter for the coming exam. Am I screwed or screwed.

There's NEWater trip tmr after school, and I have my Thursdays and Fridays free. Saturday is tuition and grandpa's birthday celebration (and I'm not done with his birthday board gift) means the whole damn day will be wasted. Sunday will be last minute cramming/revision/reading in preparation for English and HMT papers on Monday and Tuesday. Crap, just crap okay. I feel so kanchiong but I'm not doing anything. I should like totally come up with a study plan ~~which will not work anyway.~~

Dear Lord Jesus please discipline me and push me harder. Give me the motivation to study hard and do well for my upcoming EOYs. I really want to do well but I don't seem to put in much effort so I feel pretty thick skinned asking for good results. I commit my studies into your hands dear Lord. In your name I pray, Amen.

And you Sinyee bb wtf is wrong with you why are you so emo and distracted and I don't know how to describe. I don't know if I should like, talk to you or leave you alone so that you have time and space to think and perhaps feel better, 'cos that's what I'll do sometimes. Well if you'd like please do know that I'll be ready to lend you my ears. Tkcare !

Happiness is, a new creation.

2010-09-19T16:54:00.004+08:00

Hello kids, today is a Sunday.

Today is a happy Sunday.

Today is a productive Sunday.

Today Sinyee is here to entertain me personally, WHOO, I LIKE THAT (Y)

Sinyee is currently doing Math. I'm supposed to tutor her, or teach her, but apparently I can't explain my workings to her. Ah how sad. Anyway, she's been here since about 12pm+ after we got Starbucks (Y) to do D&T board and we're done with whatever we needa do so far except for 'Problem Situation' which we both have no idea whats that about.

Camwhored a little.

Today is a great Sunday at home.

Break

2010-09-17T21:51:00.002+08:00

Term 4 week 1 has gone by quickly, its the weekends now. CCAs are put on hold. That's good, I'll make use of the month for my finger to recover.

This week has been going as per normal. Better memories were having to eat tau huay for the first time after school with Mel and Sinyee. Hehe going out for lunches together occasionally's rly nice. Have been pretty busy rushing homework to meet the due dates and I get so tired every morning my eyebags are evidently becoming worse.

Anyway more interesting stuff, Ju's Malaysia buddy came today and she's so cool and friendly haha, totally different from how I was when I visited a foreign school. Talked a little about kpop and Gazette and she's supposed to teach us Malay swear words and we teach her Chinese swear words but we all ended up forgetting AHA ohwell. Took pictures at the end and my picture turned out the ugliest :\ That's the way I loooook, sadly.

Training today was okay. Mr Lee didn't come to take us for training. Did many new stuff for training today, unlike the usual routine. My finger sorta got a break 'cos jiaolian told us we could play and not set basketball ^^ Like omg playing is so much more fun. My spiking is still pretty okay hehehhe. Later on joined outside spikers to do the spiking thinghy where we threw balls ourselves, I just ttly failed. Overall training was quite okay it went on pretty well today was fun, in conclusion. I just reached home late :\

Having Chinese tuition in the morning, Math in the afternoon, both work incomplete. I should go off now.

Incomplete

2010-09-12T19:57:00.003+08:00

You're driving me insane.

Since I don't think I'll be blogging tmr,

HAPPY ONE DAY ADVANCED BIRTHDAY COUSIN SOPHIA !

Baked on Friday and Saturday and the cookies turned out good , finally (: And my homework plan kinda constipated starting Friday, thats why there's three incomplete work. At least I got the (more) important ones completed teehee.

One week has passed by so quickly and I haven't really fully utilise it for EOY revision. All I did is spend most of my mornings training, afternoon doing homework, attending tuition and have an hour off for baking before going into my pile of homework again. My holiday has been so routined. Guess I should dig out time to get some revision done. EOYs are seriously nearing.

Went out with Dad today and did Grandpa's present with cousin. I'm so tired recently my eyebags are getting from bad to worse, when it's already very bad. School which I'm dreading x9999999999 starts tmr and Bukit Panjang is coming to play with us after school. Hopefully we do well.

Sigh, I'm troubled.

I should start to increase my homework speed.

I should eat less and really lose some weight before I hit boderline overweight.

I should take care of my face, it's getting so pimple-ish.

Why isn't my finger recovering.

How am I going to play with my handicapped finger tmr.

How am I going to survive tmr.

Gossiping with Daddy is so fun HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHHE

Halfway through,

2010-09-08T17:35:00.002+08:00

Today's Wednesday, a cold and lethargic Wednesday.

Today's Wednesday, which reminds me that half the holidays are gone.

Today's Wednesday, and for some reason I have no mood to study.

Today's Wednesday, I'm tired, and there's training again tmr.

My homework completion still looks a little pathetic and I don't know what to do. I've been following my plan of completing one a day + 1 chinese summary per day so I can finish all by Saturday. I don't know what subject I should do today 'cos all of them turns me off.

Other than that, life has been the same. I have been obedient and reaching punctually for morning trainings, played better than training during school days, and gained some weight 'cos of mooncakes. Training on Monday went well for me, fell alot but I think I put up a decent performance. Today was friendly with Sembawang and I played 3 sets (?) I think. Missed less than 5 balls altogether so I guess its acceptable. I couldn't spike today though, I didn't even feel like jumping.

Mdm. Tan has yet to confirm tuition with me tmr. I hope she cancels it, 'cos friendly with Yu Hua will be ongoing (again) in the afternoon when the sun is hot and I feel most lethargic. So if I have Chinese tuition in the morning, I probably won't play well.

Sigh, I'm exhausted.

Homework overload

2010-09-05T17:38:00.001+08:00

I SEEM TO BE DOING HOMEWORK FOR HOURS BUT I'M ONLY DONE WITH MATH NOTES AND ENGLISH COMPREHENSION. WHAT NONSENSE IS THIS.

Pfft,

Hello holiday, my work-filled holiday.

2010-09-03T22:43:00.002+08:00

Long awaited holidays have started. I just like the fact I don't have to wake up at 5.30am to take a bus to school. Other than that, my holidays are no different from school days.

The amount of homework they gave us in preparation for EOYs is equivalent to our month long holiday homework, seriously. EOYs in secondary schools arent any different from primary 6 kids studying for PSLE.
My board is filled after a long long long time. How rare. And this is a week long holiday. I don't wna know what's coming up for EOY holiday homework when they prepare us for streaming.

Anyway training today has been quite slack. Secondary four seniors came back to play so played mostly in cdiv side. 4 sets there, 1 set in bdiv which I pretty much screwed. I can't juggle two positions per training and warm up for only one position. Its just crazy and doesn't make sense. But nevertheless training wasn't too tiring 'cos we didn't have physical or weights or anything. Reached home past 7.30pm after buying takeaway, tired ttm :\

Next week is Hari Raya public holiday, so training got pushed forward to Thursday. Now I have to reschedule all my tuitions, sigh. I'll only have a free Tuesday during that one week and I'll spend it studying. My life is sad. Oh no wait, I didn't have any life, I forgot.

Been trying to bake cookies but obviously failing in both attempts. So tmr I shall try again. "Shi bai shi cheng gong zhi mu", just you wait.

Hello homework, here I come.

Bliss

2010-09-02T19:10:00.002+08:00

Back to school after teachers day holiday: Lethargic.

School was pretty slack today, didn't have much lessons. Mrs Ouyang talked about IP Programme for future batches of students and how it didn't affect us, how disappointing :\ Right, so now we're part of some Victorian family. Assembly took up most of Math period, and Mr. Aiman was in a good mood today so we didn't have lessons. After that had Literature, hai Mrs. Sri is so boring I want Teow back ):

D&T was after reading and I suck at bending plastic proportionately. I had Sinyee and Mel to salvage my dead plastic which Mr. Foo deemed 'no hope', AIYOH they're so awesome ! Chinese was listening compre practice. After school decided to ditch Starbucks and went out for lunch at PP with Ju, Sinyee, Mel, Gwyneth, Sihui, Shiying and Angie, LIKE FINALLY BABEHHHH. Talked over lunch, we haven't been talking much for the past few days anyway.

Train + bus home with Ju and talked about school and streaming. Ah we're thinking so far ahead and we're so troubled ): I have comprehension to do which I fell asleep while doing sometime earlier, so I shall reattempt it again, sigh.

BB ♥

I hate this pretense

2010-08-31T20:59:00.007+08:00

Why is everyone so happy in their new secondary school (okay not exactly, its been a year), and I'm like still so allergic to Cedar.

Today school was quite okay. Mel and I joined seniors to play captains ball and tied with throwers by the time time was up, and they scored the next one, so they won. I feel so guilty, I gave 2 balls away. It's been a long time since I played captain's ball though, the last time I remembered playing, remembered, was Secondary 1 netball CCA auditions. That long. My stamina has been dropping I'm only willing to run the space of a volleyball court, sigh. Concert was quite amusing hehe.

Left for St. Hilda's and went to visit Mr. Ng and Mrs. Ho ! Mrs. Ho still kept our cards from 2008 ahh so nice and sweet of her ! Apparently Joanne, Hillary and Fiona tried to sneak in earlier but got caught, hahaha. After that sat at canteen to slack slack a bit. The school is crazy to install 4 drink vending machines who sell almost the same thing, hai seriously. Nothing changed, the stalls are the same, classrooms the same, hall the same, courts the same, but the new sports hall is fcking big. It's opening up next month I think. Averyl was having training, Jenna, Merissa and Yuwen decided not to come.

Went for lunch with Joanne, Julia, Darshana and Audrey and talked about school. Audrey seems fine in Cedar, its just me. Everyone is happy. I'm only happy with them. Laughed until stomachache while eating while Joanne spit her drink at Julia HAHA ! Overall although it was quite boring and didn't meet up with a lot of people, I guess its nice catching up with old friends. I missed them like crazy. Secondary school friends are just different. Spending one year with them and I still think it's just, not the same ? It's all fake, it's all pretense.

Didn't take photos, but its okay, I had fun thats all that matters. Came home and I've been slacking and went to buy baking stuff with Mom. Baking cookies for cousins and ahgong tmr ! Excited ! :D

I wish friends just came and didn't go,

I didn't do any wrong anyway.

Time

2010-08-29T16:10:00.002+08:00

When I don't procrastinate, I actually have a lot of time on my hands.

I've been updating more recently, because I've been completing my work more quickly, yay. Finished Chinese tuition work yesterday and there is no tuition next week. Finished Math tuition work today and there is no tuition on Tuesday. Finished the rest of the work due tmr for school, it's been a long time since I felt so accomplished.

Week 10 has started and EOYs are damn near, so I should start to buck up and stop procrastinating. Good thing (ahem) SHINee and the GazettE are pretty much inactive so I have nothing much to do. It's 4.15pm now, and I have until 6.30pm to actually get started studying for tmr's Science test before I have to cook dinner and do some ironing. Ah, sian ttm.

Training tmr and I shall play better and not use up my energy for stupid things in class, like dancing and singing to Julia. Work hard tmr, and enjoy half day and a day off from school on Wednesday. That's life.